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Independent TOEFL essay - TPO 6: Agree or disagree? Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children. v.1

Independent TOEFL essay - TPO 6: Agree or disagree? Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children. v. 1
The number of cars has increased noticeably from 1888 to 2000, in Britain. This has lead to a series of problems due to the impact of vehicles on the environment and to the public. So, alternative forms of transportation were encouraged and some suggested issuing international laws to control car ownership. However, will that do the trick? Automobiles cause a lot of damage, there's no denying it. The exhaust that they release pollutes the air and causes lots of health problems, not to mention the problems associated with traffic and how the city roads are jammed with cars. That's why some believe that monitoring car ownership would help lessen these problems; introducing a cleaner and healthier environment, facilitating transportation, and improving the citizens' lives through making cities quieter and more serene. As much as this sounds perfect, one would disagree with such a measure. You can't control people's ownership of vehicles, that is an intervention in people's freedom and would result in many troubles. For instance, lots of businesses would be harmed by such measures, as lots of people will be less inclined to travel long distances to visit these businesses if cars were banned. There is also the problem of work commuters; some people have to travel long distances for their work where public transportation wouldn't be so convenient in their case. Besides, banning cars might not solve the problem after all, as public transportation produces as much pollution as personal vehicles. Which makes us question if such a solution would really provide the efficient results that we seek. In conclusion, the traffic problem is a serious situation that should be dealt with. Nevertheless, the measures that should be used must be considerable and convenient to the public. Radical measures might provide quick fixes, however the resulting consequences might be hard to deal with.
The number of
cars
has increased
noticeably
from 1888 to 2000, in Britain. This has lead to a series of
problems
due to the impact of vehicles on the environment and to the
public
.
So
, alternative forms of
transportation
were encouraged
and
some
suggested issuing international laws to control
car
ownership.
However
, will that do the trick?

Automobiles cause a
lot
of damage, there's no denying it. The exhaust that they release pollutes the air and causes
lots
of health
problems
, not to mention the
problems
associated with traffic and how the city roads
are jammed
with
cars
. That's why
some
believe that monitoring
car
ownership would
help
lessen these
problems
; introducing a cleaner and healthier environment, facilitating
transportation
, and improving the citizens'
lives
through making cities quieter and more serene.

As much as this sounds perfect, one would disagree with such a
measure
. You can't control
people
's ownership of vehicles,
that is
an intervention in
people
's freedom and would result in
many
troubles.
For instance
,
lots
of businesses would
be harmed
by such
measures
, as
lots
of
people
will be less inclined to travel long distances to visit these businesses if
cars
were banned
. There is
also
the
problem
of work commuters;
some
people
have to
travel long distances for their work where
public
transportation
wouldn't be
so
convenient in their case.
Besides
, banning
cars
might not solve the
problem
after all
, as
public
transportation
produces as much pollution as personal vehicles. Which
makes
us question if such a solution would
really
provide the efficient results that we seek.

In conclusion
, the traffic
problem
is a serious situation that should
be dealt
with.
Nevertheless
, the
measures
that should be
used
must
be considerable and convenient to the
public
. Radical
measures
might provide quick
fixes
,
however
the resulting consequences might be
hard
to deal with.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Independent TOEFL essay - TPO 6: Agree or disagree? Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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