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Talk about a foreign movie that you liked. Please say- What was the movie? - When and where did you watch it? - Why did you like it? v.1

Talk about a foreign movie that you liked. Please say- What was the movie? - When and where did you watch it? - Why did you like it? v. 1
Young children's schooling has become a hot topic of present time. Many parents wish to send their offsprings to school at a quite early age and others oppose this mindset. Early child schooling can be discussed by both parties point of views. However, I am strongly against sending the young kids to school at a very young age as it affects their mental and physical health a lot. Parenting is one of the most difficult tasks in today's world. Generally, parents who want to send their young kids in schools usually do not have much time for their kids due to their professional commitments. Consequently, they send their young kids to school for learning. Namely, One of my friend's, was working long hours in office and also his wife use to work split shifts in a departmental store. They had one daughter who was three years old. Due to their exhaustive work schedule, they admitted her in day-boarding school. As a result of too much workload of school syllabus started affecting her mind and health that led her stay sick most of the times. On the contrary, Individuals who do not choose to send their young kids to school at a very young age, prefer to teach them in their own interesting way. They usually believe kids can learn more from playing the games. For instance, I know one of my friend's, who had two kids of age 3 and 4 years respectively. He allowed them to play all times and also teach them about what to learn from the games they usually play. Hence, these kids were more active and intelligent. Furthermore, they time they admitted in school, they performed much better as compare to other kids of the same age who started school in a very early age. To conclude, Children early age learning indeed plays an important role in their future life. Therefore, this decision must be taken by parents after careful study of their child behaviour. Furthermore, I highly recommend that parent should not send young children to school and let them learn by playing. Because, its human nature that they learn more from experience as compare to studying in schools.
Young
children's schooling has become a hot topic of present
time
.
Many
parents
wish to
send
their
offsprings
to
school
at a quite
early
age
and others
oppose this mindset.
Early
child schooling can
be discussed
by both parties point of views.
However
, I am
strongly
against sending the
young
kids
to
school
at a
very
young
age
as it affects their mental and physical health a lot.

Parenting is one of the most difficult tasks in
today
's world.
Generally
,
parents
who
want to
send
their
young
kids
in
schools
usually
do not have much
time
for their
kids
due to their professional commitments.
Consequently
, they
send
their
young
kids
to
school
for learning.
Namely
, One of my friend's, was working long hours in office and
also
his wife
use to
work split shifts in a departmental store. They had one daughter
who
was three years
old
. Due to their exhaustive work schedule, they admitted her in day-boarding
school
.
As a result
of too much workload of
school
syllabus
started
affecting her mind and health that led her stay sick
most of the times
.

On the contrary
, Individuals
who
do not choose to
send
their
young
kids
to
school
at a
very
young
age
, prefer to teach them in their
own
interesting way. They
usually
believe
kids
can
learn
more from playing the games.
For instance
, I know one of my friend's,
who
had two
kids
of
age
3 and 4 years
respectively
. He
allowed
them to play all
times
and
also
teach them about what to
learn
from the games they
usually
play.
Hence
, these
kids
were more active and intelligent.
Furthermore
, they
time
they admitted in
school
, they performed much better as compare to other
kids
of the same
age
who
started
school
in a
very
early
age.

To conclude
, Children
early
age
learning
indeed
plays an
important
role in their future life.
Therefore
, this decision
must
be taken
by
parents
after careful study of their child
behaviour
.
Furthermore
, I
highly
recommend that
parent
should not
send
young
children to
school
and
let
them
learn
by playing.
Because
, its human nature that they
learn
more from experience as compare to studying in
schools
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Talk about a foreign movie that you liked. Please say- What was the movie? - When and where did you watch it? - Why did you like it? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
365 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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