Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Successful sport professionals earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified, while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion v.1

Successful sport professionals earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified, while others think it is unfair. 1
Although it is thought unjustified by some that successful athletes earn more income than other professionals, others hold the view that the pay is well -deserved. In my opinion, while it is valid to pay them such a huge amount, other workers ought to be paid according to their contributions to mankind. On the one hand, supporters of the outrageous amount earned by these sport professionals believe that their earnings are justified based on certain reasons. One major reason for their support, is the rigorous and back-bending trainings these people undergo to become fit, and to be able to participate in all forms of competition, while also making efforts to be champions. To illustrate, Cristiano Ronaldo, a football player, earns over 100 million pounds each month. This is seen to be deserved as a result of the duration he spends on workouts and other activities. Another reason they considered, is the realization that participation in these sporting activities is not continuous, and as such, the huge sum paid is meant to last for a long time until another contract is awarded. However, I consider that other professionals in other fields deserve a pay commensurate with their services. This includes Doctors, Lawyers, Police Officers etc. For instance, Doctors undergo rigorous medical training over a period of at least 12 years to attain the peak of their career. While doing this, they sacrifice pleasure and family time for the health and safety of the populace, but get paid about one-tenth of the earnings of an athlete. Furthermore, Police Officers are law enforcement agents that oversee the safety and security of the society. Thus, their duties, in my opinion, are much more important than trophies that can be won. In conclusion, while people may vary in their opinions regarding the earnings of different professionals, I believe that individuals deserve payments commensurate with their duties.
Although it is
thought
unjustified by
some
that successful athletes earn more income than
other
professionals
, others hold the view that the pay is well -deserved. In my opinion, while it is valid to pay them such a huge amount,
other
workers ought to
be paid
according to their contributions to mankind.

On the one hand, supporters of the outrageous amount earned by these sport
professionals
believe that their earnings
are justified
based on certain reasons. One major reason for their support, is the rigorous and back-bending trainings these
people
undergo to become fit, and to be able to participate in all forms of competition, while
also
making efforts to be champions. To illustrate, Cristiano Ronaldo, a football player, earns over 100 million pounds each month. This is
seen
to
be deserved
as a result
of the duration he spends on workouts and
other
activities. Another reason they considered, is the realization that participation in these sporting activities is not continuous, and as such, the huge sum paid
is meant
to last for a long time until another contract
is awarded
.

However
, I consider that
other
professionals
in
other
fields deserve a pay commensurate with their services. This includes Doctors, Lawyers, Police Officers etc.
For instance
, Doctors undergo rigorous medical training over a period of at least 12 years to attain the peak of their career. While doing this, they sacrifice pleasure and family time for the health and safety of the populace,
but
get
paid about one-tenth of the earnings of an athlete.
Furthermore
, Police Officers are law enforcement agents that oversee the safety and security of the society.
Thus
, their duties, in my opinion, are much more
important
than trophies that can
be won
.

In conclusion
, while
people
may vary in their opinions regarding the earnings of
different
professionals
, I believe that individuals deserve payments commensurate with their duties.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Successful sport professionals earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified, while others think it is unfair. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts