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Stores should sell local food products and not the imported food products. Do you agree or disagree? v.2

Stores should sell local food products and not the imported food products. v. 2
Now-a-days, the foreign culture, food business has been increasing and a huge demand for them. Some people think that shops should sell merely a local community related food items, but not the international cooking recipes. I completely disagree with the statement and I believe that, this field should not be limited to a specific category rather it should be multicultural items. This essay will discuss the various reasons to support this argument. To begin with, the predominant reason would be, the client satisfaction and their requirements. In the 21st century, people's thinking capabilities has been changed drastically and those are always volatile. In order to satisfy the customer needs, the local stores need to improve the foreign products as well. Apparently, with multicultural meal varieties, there is always a high probability of increasing the client visits. As a result, It will expand the business in that area and soon the shops and the locality of that area will be developed. Moreover, with increased business, the owners of the shops will be happy with the unexpected profits and their exponential growth rate. Additionally, the import and export sector will have a significant development with by importing international meal brands and their respective ingredients. Also, while importing these items people need to pay various taxes to their respective revenue departments at different levels and these taxed funds would be helpful to the society if the government used them wisely. To conclude, in my view, not only local community dishes, but also international branded food items need to be sold in the local shops. Otherwise, it's difficult to satisfy the purchaser volatile requirements by local foods
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
-a-days, the foreign culture,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
business has been increasing and a huge demand for them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
should sell
merely
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
community related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the international cooking recipes. I completely disagree with the statement and I believe that, this field should not
be limited
to a specific category
rather
it should be multicultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
. This essay will discuss the various reasons to support this argument.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the predominant reason would be, the client satisfaction and their requirements. In the 21st century,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's thinking capabilities has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
drastically
and those are always volatile. In order to satisfy the customer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
stores
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the foreign products
as well
.

Apparently
, with multicultural meal varieties, there is always a high probability of increasing the client visits.
As a result
, It will expand the business in that area and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
and the locality of that area will
be developed
.

Moreover
, with increased business, the owners of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
will be happy with the unexpected profits and their exponential growth rate.
Additionally
, the import and export sector will have a significant development with by importing international meal brands and their respective ingredients.
Also
, while importing these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to pay various taxes to their respective revenue departments at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
levels and these taxed funds would be helpful to the society if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
them
wisely
.

To conclude
, in my view, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
community dishes,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
international branded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
be sold
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
.
Otherwise
, it's difficult to satisfy the purchaser volatile requirements by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Stores should sell local food products and not the imported food products. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
272 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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