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Speaking topic in text: When people have devoted time or resources to a certain project, they generally want to see it succeed. However, they may grow so attached to the idea of a successful outcome that even if it starts to look like the project will fai v.1

Speaking topic in text: When people have devoted time or resources to a certain project, they generally want to see it succeed. However, they may grow so attached to the idea of a successful outcome that even if it starts to look like the project will fai v. 1
People have differing views with regard to the question whether work hard to gain stuffs affect the values of oneself. In my opinion, I disagree with quotation, and I will discuss my point of view in this essay. Nowadays, the world has considerably developed, many old-fashioned stuffs have disappeared from living, namely, traditional lifestyles, the way which people think about their availability. People start working hard in the competitive society, not only for high revenue, but also a chance for their promotion, likewise, stress becomes one of the most important obstacle. Stressful environment among society make people to have something to attenuate their condition, for instance, buying is one of the easiest things to do. Thinking that someone has been working hard throughout a hard year, and finally gains his success and high income, but with the exchange of health problem. Relaxing may be one of the things that he can do, with convenient technology, in particular, spending salary for something to soothe oneself is reasonable. On the other hand, one's worth can not be judged by lifestyle. Furthermore, it is common when people spend their own wage with something they want, without losing any of their value, as long as they do not exploit the others, I do not think that would be a problem. Additionally, people always want to improve their living, and if someone thinks that having many payment and spending cash is pleasure, that would not be a complication. In conclusion, I think people have their own way to explore their pleasure and happiness in their life. Buying may be one of several ways for someone which alleviated his stress, and this cannot be judged by the others to cause losing someone's value.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have differing views with regard to
Consider shortening this phrase to just "whether", or rephrase the sentence to avoid "the question".
the question whether
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
to gain stuffs affect the values of oneself. In my opinion, I disagree with quotation, and I will discuss my point of view in this essay.

Nowadays, the world has
considerably
developed,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
-fashioned stuffs have disappeared from living,
namely
, traditional lifestyles, the way which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
about their availability.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
in the competitive society, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for high revenue,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
a chance for their promotion,
likewise
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
becomes one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
Please check whether a plural form of 'obstacle' should be used.
obstacle
. Stressful environment among society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have something to attenuate their condition,
for instance
, buying is one of the easiest things to do. Thinking that someone has been working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
throughout a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
year, and
finally
gains his success and high income,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with the exchange of health problem. Relaxing may be one of the things that he can do, with convenient technology,
in particular
, spending salary for something to soothe oneself is reasonable.

On the other hand
, one's worth can not
be judged
by lifestyle.
Furthermore
, it is common when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
wage with something they want, without losing any of their value, as long as they do not exploit the others, I do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that would be a problem.
Additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
always want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their living, and if someone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thinks
that having
Possible agreement error. The noun payment seems to be countable; consider using: "many payments".
many payment
and spending cash is pleasure, that would not be a complication.

In conclusion
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
way to explore their pleasure and happiness in their life. Buying may be one of several ways for someone which alleviated his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, and this cannot
be judged
by the others to cause losing someone's value.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Speaking topic in text: When people have devoted time or resources to a certain project, they generally want to see it succeed. However, they may grow so attached to the idea of a successful outcome that even if it starts to look like the project will fai v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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