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Speaking more than one language is important these days. Therefore, children should start learning a second language during their school time. Do you agree or disagree? v.2

Speaking more than one language is important these days. Therefore, children should start learning a second language during their school time. v. 2
Over the past century, the globalization has allowed people to travel across the world for work, study or tourism, which has led to the need of knowing different languages. Certain people feel that learning a second language will detach their children from the cultural values of their nation while many people, including myself, believe that learning a new language will benefit children in many aspects. Certain individuals want to stick with their traditional opinions and culture because of which they do not prefer teaching their offspring the languages other than the native one. They believe that if a child is introduced to a foreign language, the child will get influenced by it and will start losing the roots of native language, also it will start creating a gap between the generations because young generation will not be able to communicate with the older generation. However, old generation will understand the positive side of learning a new language when they are introduced to the beneficial outcome of knowing foreign languages. Another kind of people believe that learning a foreign language is the need of an hour as government of many countries are offering job opportunities, permitting people to settle in their nation and promoting tourism. Indeed, the communication will become easier between tourists and local people, if tourist knows the foreign language. Certain individuals put their children in foreign language classes at an early age because they believe that a child grasp new habits easily, so he will learn new language effortlessly and will have a good command over it. Nowadays, parents are helping their offspring to learn through the internet also by providing educational videos and articles published on the internet. Personally, I agree with the thought of being bi-linguistic or multi-linguistic as it will help in the development of a person as well as society.
Over the past century, the globalization has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to travel across the world for work, study or tourism, which has led to the need of knowing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
. Certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
will detach their children from the cultural values of their nation while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, including myself,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
will benefit children in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects.

Certain individuals want to stick with their traditional opinions and culture
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which they do not prefer teaching their offspring the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
other than the native one. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that if a child
is introduced
to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, the child will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
influenced by it and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
losing the roots of native
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
,
also
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
creating a gap between the generations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
young generation will not be able to communicate with the older generation.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
generation will understand the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
side of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
when they
are introduced
to the beneficial outcome of knowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
languages.

Another kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is the need of an hour as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries are offering job opportunities, permitting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to settle in their nation and promoting tourism.
Indeed
, the communication will become easier between tourists and local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, if tourist knows the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. Certain individuals put their children in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
classes at an early age
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that a child grasp
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
habits
easily
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
he will learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
effortlessly
and will have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
command over it. Nowadays, parents are helping their offspring to learn through the internet
also
by providing educational videos and articles published on the internet.

Personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
of being bi-linguistic or multi-linguistic as it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in the development of a person
as well
as society.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Speaking more than one language is important these days. Therefore, children should start learning a second language during their school time. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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