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<span class="postbody">Some people believe that they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. v.1

<span class="postbody">Some people believe that they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. v. 1
A group of people think that residents should keep all their earnings and should not have an obligation in paying taxes to the government. I personally disagree with the statement as taxes are useful for the residents and the nation themselves, and the following essay will discuss it in details. To begin with, it is a fact that taxes are used by the government for developing its nations. Taxes are allocated for various kinds of essential matters. Firstly, they are used for expanding and maintaining public transportation facilities, such expanding roads and highways, and replacing old public transportation units. Secondly, taxes are utilised for providing decent medical services and basic educations for their residents. And last but not least, taxes are also used for funding military services, which is important for maintaining the political stability of a nation. And then, people should also notice that taxes that they have paid, will also be beneficial for themselves sooner or later. Some of the funds that have been collected by tax authorities are used for retirement funds. It means that in the end people will enjoy and benefit some personal facilities from the government, which are funded from taxes. Therefore people should not keep their earnings to themselves and they should comply in paying their tax duties and obligations. In conclusion, I do not agree if we should keep all our income and not pay any taxes to the government, as taxes are beneficial for the development of the people and the nation themselves.
A group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that residents should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
all their earnings and should not have an obligation in paying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. I
personally
disagree with the statement as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are useful for the residents and the nation themselves, and the following essay will discuss it in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, it is a fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
for developing its nations.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Taxes
are allocated
for various kinds of essential matters.
Firstly
, they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for expanding and maintaining public transportation facilities, such expanding roads and highways, and replacing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
public transportation units.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are
Possible spelling mistake. 'utilised' is British English.
utilised
for providing decent medical services and basic educations for their residents. And last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for funding military services, which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for maintaining the political stability of a nation.

And then,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
also
notice that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
that they have paid, will
also
be beneficial for themselves sooner or later.
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
Some of the
funds that have
been collected
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
authorities are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for retirement funds. It means that in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will enjoy and benefit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
personal facilities from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, which
are funded
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their earnings to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
themselves and
they should comply in paying their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
duties and obligations.

In conclusion
, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
if we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
all our income and not pay any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are beneficial for the development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and the nation themselves.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay <span class="postbody">Some people believe that they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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