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Some schools put the most advanced students in separate classes from their peers so they can study more challenging materials. Do the advantages of this practice outweigh the disadvantages? v.3

Some schools put the most advanced students in separate classes from their peers so they can study more challenging materials. Do the advantages of this practice outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3
It is commonly believed by many that university education should target more on academic subjects, while some others believe that practical subjects should be given more preference at higher educational institutions. In this essay, I will examine both the views and provide my opinion. To begin with, academic subjects are essential for the background knowledge and cultural awareness. If these subjects got removed from the curriculum or given lower preference, then younger generation would lack their interest in those subjects. Moreover, professions such as journalism, archaeologist and professors require immense study about history and other academic subjects which could not be gained in a better way than higher education institutions. Also, there is a very famous saying that 'a nation will soon lose his existence, if its youth has forgotten its history'. Every youngster should remember the sacrifices of freedom fighters and their national culture, including food, language, dressing style. It could be plausible if universities give more preference to academic subjects. On the other side, In this competitive world, practical knowledge of the subjects had become a necessity. Most of the companies hire those students who have some practical studies. Also to mark one's place in this competent world, everyone has to earn extraordinary skills, thus having studied practical subjects such as engineering and mechanics is beneficial. In my opinion, universities should focus more on practical courses rather than theoretical courses. After all, every student pursue higher studies with a motive to grab a high-profile job and earn a decent salary which is easily possible if one has learned practical subjects. In conclusion, both academic studies and practical studies are an essential part of the higher studies syllabus hence both the courses have their own advantages. However, I feel that colleges should concentrate on practical studies as they offer better opportunities of job for students.
It is
commonly
believed by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
that university education should target more on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
more preference at higher educational institutions. In this essay, I will examine both the views and provide my opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are essential for the background knowledge and cultural awareness. If these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
removed from the curriculum or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
lower preference, then younger generation would lack their interest in those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
.
Moreover
, professions such as journalism, archaeologist and professors require immense
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
about history and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
which could not
be gained
in a better way than higher education institutions.
Also
, there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
saying that 'a nation will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
lose his existence, if its youth has forgotten its history'. Every youngster should remember the sacrifices of freedom fighters and their national culture, including food, language, dressing style. It could be plausible if universities give more preference to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
subjects.

On the other side, In this competitive world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
knowledge of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
had become a necessity. Most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
hire those students who have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
to mark one's place in this competent world, everyone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
earn extraordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
,
thus
having studied
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as engineering and mechanics is beneficial.

In my opinion, universities should focus more on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
courses
rather
than theoretical courses.
After all
, every student pursue higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
with a motive to grab a high-profile job and earn a decent salary which is
easily
possible if one has learned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
subjects.

In conclusion
, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
are an essential part of the higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
syllabus
hence
both the courses have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantages.
However
, I feel that colleges should concentrate on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
as they offer better opportunities of job for students.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some schools put the most advanced students in separate classes from their peers so they can study more challenging materials. Do the advantages of this practice outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
306 words
7.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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