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Some say that young and energetic employees are the most valuable for the company, others argue that older employees have more experience and knowledge. v.3

Some say that young and energetic employees are the most valuable for the company, others argue that older employees have more experience and knowledge. v. 3
It is essential for a company to be equipped with employees who can positively contribute to its business. Some argue that more young people should be recruited to achieve this goal while others insist on fulfilling the same task by employing older counterparts. However, it is felt that a desirable position to demonstrate the question is to differentiate what each age group is good at, and how they can bring values to a company. Young employees' physical strength and creativity can bring fresh perspectives to an organisation. Older people are usually conservative in terms of exploring innovative pathways or unfamiliar changes. Young people are however always eager to gain new experiences and this often helps firms generate ground-breaking ideas. For example, the marketing company I work for usually relies on university graduates' brainstorming process when attempting to roll out new products. Their imaginative thoughts and inexhaustible trials have indeed supported the company to create many unique products. On the other hand, the experienced and qualified intellectual properties possessed by older workers are equivalently crucial for a company's success. In fact, as is the case with my father's company, the organisation prefers to hire mature aged workers than younger ones. This is mainly because of their belief that one's ability to manage unexpected situations, such as safety issues or important business decisions usually come from long years of working. In conclusion, the aforementioned ideas clearly substantiate that both young and older employees are equally able to contribute to a company's future.
It is essential for a
company
to
be equipped
with employees who can
positively
contribute to its business.
Some
argue that more young
people
should
be recruited
to achieve this goal while others insist on fulfilling the same task by employing
older
counterparts.
However
, it
is felt
that a desirable position to demonstrate the question is to differentiate what each age group is
good
at, and how they can bring values to a
company
.

Young employees' physical strength and creativity can bring fresh perspectives to an
organisation
.
Older
people
are
usually
conservative in terms of exploring innovative pathways or unfamiliar
changes
. Young
people
are
however
always eager to gain new experiences and this
often
helps
firms generate ground-breaking
ideas
.
For example
, the marketing
company
I work for
usually
relies on university graduates' brainstorming process when attempting to roll out new products. Their imaginative thoughts and inexhaustible trials have
indeed
supported the
company
to create
many
unique products.

On the other hand
, the experienced and qualified intellectual properties possessed by
older
workers are
equivalently
crucial for a
company
's success. In fact, as is the case with my father's
company
, the
organisation
prefers to hire mature aged workers than younger ones. This is
mainly
because
of their belief that one's ability to manage unexpected situations, such as safety issues or
important
business decisions
usually
come
from long years of working.

In conclusion
, the aforementioned
ideas
clearly
substantiate that both young and
older
employees are
equally
able to contribute to a
company
's future.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some say that young and energetic employees are the most valuable for the company, others argue that older employees have more experience and knowledge. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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