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Some psychologists think that the best way to overcome the stress of everyday life is to spend a portion of the day doing absolutely nothing To what extent do you agree or disagree v.3

Some psychologists think that the best way to overcome the stress of everyday life is to spend a portion of the day doing absolutely nothing v. 3
A number of psychologists believe that people to overcome their stress of every day affairs need to do nothing a portion of a day. However, it appears that this idea cannot be completely correct. I will explain why in this essay. Firstly, according to people' s experiences, when they are workless, they cannot avoid thinking about the sources of stress. This is because, they are able to focus on their problems due to the sufficient time they have to check all aspects of their issues while they do anything. As a result, it makes us suffer from a high level of stress. In addition, a second and perhaps most significant and negative impact of this method is to miss a part of life' s opportunities which can be used in order to take effective actions. For instance, in the modern life which is full of stress, individuals should spend their time to search for easier remedies to solve their problems to be safe from the sources of anxiety. Although there are a lot of reasons for stress of every day life these days, overcoming them is easier than the past thanks to the technological improvements. Thus, people should not miss their opportunities by doing nothing. It is true that the tiredness would be the primary source of stress and people need to be relaxed and free of stress in a portion of a day to refresh themselves. Despite this, today' s life is like a competition. If individuals miss their opportunities because of tiredness, they wont have any chance to improve as much as they wish. To conclude, this method to reduce the stress may not be effective. It seems to me that it could not help people not only to get opportunities but also to overcome the stress of everyday life.
A number of psychologists believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to overcome their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
of every day affairs need to do nothing a portion of a day.
However
, it appears that this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
cannot be completely correct. I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why in this essay.

Firstly
, according to
Possible spelling mistake found.
people&
#039; s experiences, when they are
Possible spelling mistake found.
workless
, they cannot avoid thinking about the sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, they are able to focus on their problems due to the sufficient time they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
all aspects of their issues while they do anything.
As a result
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
us suffer from a high level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
.
In addition
, a second and perhaps most significant and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact of this method is to miss a part of
Possible spelling mistake found.
life&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
which can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in order to take effective actions.
For instance
, in the modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
which is full of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
, individuals should spend their time to search for easier remedies to solve their problems to be safe from the sources of anxiety. Although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
reasons for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
of every day
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
these days, overcoming them is easier than the past thanks to the technological improvements.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should not miss their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
by doing nothing.

It is true that the tiredness would be the primary source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need to
be relaxed
and free of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
in a portion of a day to refresh themselves. Despite this,
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is like a competition. If individuals miss their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of tiredness, they
Please make sure you mean 'wont' (a habit), not "won't"/"won’t" (short for 'will not')?
wont
have any chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
as much as they wish.

To conclude
, this method to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
may not be effective. It seems to me that it could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opportunities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to overcome the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
of everyday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Some psychologists think that the best way to overcome the stress of everyday life is to spend a portion of the day doing absolutely nothing v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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