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Some peple think it is better for children to grown up in the city, while others think that life in the coutryside is more suitable for them. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both places? v.2

Some peple think it is better for children to grown up in the city, while others think that life in the coutryside is more suitable for them. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both places? v. 2
Does a place impact the quality of teenagers brought up? What role location has in the development of juveniles? Some people believe that brought up of a child in cities bring advantages like basic health and education facilities, other believe upbringing in rural areas help in affiliation with nature, and their health is good as compare to youngsters of cities. To begin with, Upbringing, which is crucial for child future, in urban areas has distinct advantages to children because of the amenities which rural areas might are not equipped with. Nowadays, brought up in cities comparatively have a greater sense of socialization because cities are often considered cosmopolitan due to increased mobilization from rural areas. Planned development of cities Municipal communities due to industrialization and high-capacity public transport allows access to basic facilities like education and health. However, young dwellers merely have an association with the natural environment because of industrialization, and as a fact that cities are developed far-flung from nature. The added disadvantage cities offer that hyper-paced life in cities make it more difficult for them to develop the sense of community, even people do not know about their neighbors. Merits and demerits of child brought-up in the countryside are, but not limited to, close association with nature and access to healthy and natural food harvested and produced without using pesticides. Rural areas are often sparsely populated and developed on the outskirts which facilitates its dwellers to enjoy the natural environment which ultimately helps in their nourishment. Moreover, most of the inhabitants are associated with the agriculture and animals husbandry which provide them with fresh vegetables and meat. However, Life in villages and towns suffers basic facilities and amenities. Children developed often do not have easy access to education and health facilities. Furthermore, they do not have access to the latest technologies which can create problems in their future lives. To conclude, raising children in urban areas have access to education and health but these come at the cost of their health and social life. Similarly, Ruler areas provide access to food and nature at the cost of their education and health.
Does a place impact the quality of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
brought up? What role location has in the development of juveniles?
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that brought up of a child in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
bring advantages like basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
facilities, other believe upbringing in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in affiliation with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
, and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
as compare to youngsters of cities.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, Upbringing, which is crucial for child future, in urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
has distinct advantages to children
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the amenities which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
might are not equipped with. Nowadays, brought up in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
comparatively
have a greater sense of socialization
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
considered cosmopolitan due to increased mobilization from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. Planned development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
Municipal communities due to industrialization and high-capacity public transport
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to basic facilities like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
However
, young dwellers
merely
have an association with the natural environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of industrialization, and as a fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are developed
far-flung from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
disadvantage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
offer that hyper-paced life in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it more difficult for them to develop the sense of community, even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do not know about their neighbors.

Merits and demerits of child brought-up in the countryside are,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not limited to, close association with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to healthy and natural food harvested and produced without using pesticides.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
sparsely
populated and developed on the outskirts which facilitates its dwellers to enjoy the natural environment which
ultimately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in their nourishment.
Moreover
, most of the inhabitants
are associated
with the agriculture and animals husbandry which provide them with fresh vegetables and meat.
However
, Life in villages and towns suffers basic facilities and amenities. Children developed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
do not have easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
facilities.
Furthermore
, they do not have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to the latest technologies which can create problems in their future
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

To conclude
, raising children in urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
at the cost of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and social life.
Similarly
, Ruler
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to food and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
at the cost of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
40Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Some peple think it is better for children to grown up in the city, while others think that life in the coutryside is more suitable for them. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both places? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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