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Some people think young people should follow the traditions of their society. Others think that they should be free to behave as individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

Some people think young people should follow the traditions of their society. Others think that they should be free to behave as individuals. v. 1
In the world of intermingled and juxtaposed nations, some people assume distinct social traditions should be followed by the young generation. However, some advocate for individualism supporting free styles of behavior. As well as offering my opinion, this essay will discuss both sides of this phenomenon in depth. On the one hand, preservation of long traditional features properly has its own moral advantages. Specifically, traditional values may support respect for one another, thus improving the cohesion of families and solidarity of the countries as well. For example, traditions teach the young to respect family members and the elderly. This can make the community more organized and civilized because the youth are more considerate and outgoing. Unfortunately, if the traditions are not continuously inherited, it will fade and disappear through some generations. Hence, it is reasonable that social traditional cultures should be preserved in the long run. However, there are some people argue that the youth should freely behave as what they want to do. As a matter of fact, there is a widespread consensus that the young generation are living in a world different from that of their ancestors. Additionally, behaving independently possibly involves stimulation of creativity and innovation. Moreover, it is unfair for the youth to follow and preserve those outdated and decadent cultural traditions which are no longer suitable at the present. Therefore, embracing the old traditions will prevent young generations from fast adapting into new environments and developing. To conclude, this essay provided uphold the unrestrained behaviors of the youth and free expression of their own personalities. They have rights to assert and to be themselves because they are leading the modern world with different regimes and rules.
In the world of intermingled and juxtaposed nations,
some
people
assume distinct social
traditions
should
be followed
by the
young
generation.
However
,
some
advocate for individualism supporting free styles of behavior.
As well
as offering my opinion, this essay will discuss both sides of this phenomenon in depth.

On the one hand, preservation of long traditional features
properly
has its
own
moral advantages.
Specifically
, traditional values may support respect for one another,
thus
improving the cohesion of families and solidarity of the countries
as well
.
For example
,
traditions
teach the
young
to respect family members and the elderly. This can
make
the community more organized and civilized
because
the
youth
are more considerate and outgoing.

Unfortunately, if the
traditions
are not
continuously
inherited, it will fade and disappear through
some
generations.
Hence
, it is reasonable that social traditional cultures should
be preserved
in the long run.

However
, there are
some
people
argue that the
youth
should
freely
behave as what they want to do. As a matter of fact, there is a widespread consensus that the
young
generation are living in a world
different
from that of their ancestors.
Additionally
, behaving
independently
possibly
involves stimulation of creativity and innovation.
Moreover
, it is unfair for the
youth
to follow and preserve those outdated and decadent cultural
traditions
which are no longer suitable at the present.
Therefore
, embracing the
old
traditions
will
prevent
young
generations from
fast
adapting into new environments and developing.

To conclude
, this essay provided uphold the unrestrained behaviors of the
youth
and free expression of their
own
personalities. They have rights to assert and to be themselves
because
they are leading the modern world with
different
regimes and
rules
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay Some people think young people should follow the traditions of their society. Others think that they should be free to behave as individuals. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
281 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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