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Some people think the media should not report details of crime to the public. What extent do you agree or disagree. v.2

Some people think the media should not report details of crime to the public. What extent v. 2
Due to advancement in technology, media plays vital role in getting day to day updates. Many ponder that crime details should not be reported by public. I agree with this statement to greater extend. Although nowadays crime rate has increased to a greater extend but from media reports, some people get encourage to commit such crime. I intend to discuss my view in following paragraphs. First and foremost, media reports such crimes cases more because it helps them to increase their TRP and people are more keen in knowing about such incidents. But it has a negative effect on the society mostly teenagers. For instance, robbery cases, rape cases are reported in the news on a daily basis, which indirectly affects the mind of the younger generation and the details about the cases helps them to conduct this hideous crime. Thus, media should limit the crime reports to headlines and with lesser information. Secondly, though media reports help in spreading awareness about the causes of such crimes, in spite of lowering the crime rate, more and more crime are committed in the entire world. Most of the members of the society learn many frauds by watching media, movies and such series, many believe about the what is shown on television. Thus, the media should report precise and the correct information about the crime rather than detail knowledge about it. Few restrictions should be imposed by the government to reduce such publication which will lower the chances of committing such crime to some extend. In the conclusion, I would like to pen down, saying that, although the media are the major platform about knowing the problems happening worldwide, but sometimes it can mislead younger generation and causes many regretful crimes. Hence, media should limit in publishing in details about the crime case.
Due to advancement in technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
plays vital role in getting day to day updates.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
ponder that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
details
should not
be reported
by public. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement to greater extend. Although nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate has increased to a greater
Did you mean the noun "extent"?
extend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reports
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
encourage to commit such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. I intend to discuss my view in following paragraphs.

First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reports
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
cases more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to increase their TRP and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are more keen in knowing about such incidents.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on the society
mostly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
.
For instance
, robbery cases, rape cases
are reported
in the news on a daily basis, which
indirectly
affects the mind of the younger generation and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
details
about the cases
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to conduct this hideous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
should limit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reports
to headlines and with lesser information.

Secondly
, though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in spreading awareness about the causes of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
in spite of
lowering the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate, more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
are committed
in the entire world. Most of the members of the society learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
frauds by watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, movies and such series,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
believe about the what
is shown
on television.
Thus
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
report
precise and the correct information about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
detail
knowledge about it. Few restrictions should
be imposed
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
such publication which will lower the chances of committing such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean the noun "extent"?
extend
.

In the conclusion, I would like to pen down, saying that, although the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
are the major platform about knowing the problems happening worldwide,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
it can mislead younger generation and causes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
regretful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
should limit in publishing in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
details
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
case.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay Some people think the media should not report details of crime to the public. What extent v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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