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Some people think that with the increasing use of mobile phones and computers, people lose the ability to communicate face to face. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people think that with the increasing use of mobile phones and computers, people lose the ability to communicate face to face. v. 1
Technology has widely immersed in daily activities. An increasing number of people are using technology devices such as mobile phones and computers than that in last decade, while some people also worried about their face to face communication skills are losing somewhat in this way. I agree that people will not handle with traditional communication skills if they continue utilizing technological devices in their life. This essay will discuss the growing use of mobile phones and computers and the fading of face to face communication ability. It is common that current people choose smart phones and laptops as their working equipment. Because the companies required, employees should adapt to the working environment by applying technology devices to complete single or multiple projects and it is feasible to access to or supervise the progress of each project. This leads the project to become well-projected and to process smoothly. In a business world, therefore, efficiency and time saving are beyond other factors when complete a project as technology could help people achieve this goal immediately. The growth of utilizing phones and computers is inevitable. Although people now communicate with each other through texting or calling, the traditional conversations are still needed in more social activities. For instance, young children attend schools that is not only to read a book, but also to learn social skills. Interpersonal skill is one of the essential skills in social life. Messages cannot convey the emotion of the senders and it may deliver the wrong information if the sender makes typo errors. As a result, face to face communication will be fading in next generations in the future. To conclude, using mobile phones and computers is inevitable in the business world, but it can affect the interpersonal communications for the next generations. In my opinion, technology could bring convenience to our social life if it should be controlled by the user rather than the effect in reverse.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
has
widely
immersed in daily activities. An increasing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
devices such as mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and computers than that in last decade, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
also
worried about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are losing somewhat in this way. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will not handle with traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
if they continue utilizing technological devices in their life. This essay will discuss the growing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and computers and the fading of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
ability.

It is common that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and laptops as their working equipment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
required, employees should adapt to the working environment by applying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
devices to complete single or multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
and it is feasible to access to or supervise the progress of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
. This leads the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
to become well-projected and to process
smoothly
. In a business world,
therefore
, efficiency and time saving are beyond other factors when complete a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
achieve this goal immediately. The growth of utilizing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and computers is inevitable.

Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
communicate with each other through texting or calling, the traditional conversations are
still
needed in more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
activities.
For instance
, young children attend schools
that is
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to read a book,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. Interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
is one of the essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
life. Messages cannot convey the emotion of the senders and it may deliver the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
information if the sender
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
typo errors.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
will be fading in
next
generations in the future.

To conclude
, using mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and computers is inevitable in the business world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it can affect the interpersonal communications for the
next
generations. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
could bring convenience to our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
life if it should
be controlled
by the user
rather
than the effect in reverse.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that with the increasing use of mobile phones and computers, people lose the ability to communicate face to face. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
320 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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