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Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in zoos. Others believe that there are good reasons for having zoos. Discuss both these views and give your opinion v.1

Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in zoos. Others believe that there are good reasons for having zoos. 1
Zoos represent both entertainment and educational place to go. Having zoos as important as museums. Museums are a showplace for art pieces that represent the culture of that country and zoos are show place for animals mainly belong to that country. Keeping wild animals could be a safety concern issue for some people, but with taking extra safety precautions, the problem will be solved. Zoos are often an attractive place for both citizens and visitors. All age groups are interested to visit zoos. Kids in particular usually admired visiting zoos, they find it enjoyable to have a chance to see the animals and listen to the different sounds the animals can produce. In addition, this is a good way to educate the kids about animals, their names, shapes and habitats. Furthermore, that can stimulate them further to search and collect more information from the internet or books later on. Noteworthy to mention that zoos represent an attractive showplace for visitors to any country. In my opinion, having zoos is really valuable. However, a safety concern is always raised regarding having wild animals in the zoos. There are many accidents have occurred in many zoos worldwide. Exposure the visitors to the danger of wild animals attack is definitely unacceptable. Although, it is a real danger, but with extensive safety precautions this problem can be overcome. In conclusion, Despite the safety problem with having wild animals in zoos, The advantages of having zoos outweigh the risks. In addition, we have the ability to overcome that problem with extra safety precautions.
Zoos represent both entertainment and educational place to go.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Having
zoos as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as museums. Museums are a showplace for art pieces that represent the culture of that country and zoos are
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
show place
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
mainly
belong to that country. Keeping wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
could be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
concern issue for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with taking extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
precautions, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
will
be solved
.

Zoos are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
an attractive place for both citizens and visitors. All age groups
are interested
to visit zoos. Kids
in particular
usually
admired visiting zoos, they find it enjoyable to have a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and listen to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sounds the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
can produce.
In addition
, this is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to educate the kids about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, their names, shapes and habitats.
Furthermore
, that can stimulate them
further
to search and collect more information from the internet or books later on. Noteworthy to mention that zoos represent an attractive showplace for visitors to any country. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
zoos is
really
valuable.

However
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
concern is always raised regarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in the zoos. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
accidents have occurred in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
zoos worldwide. Exposure the visitors to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
attack is definitely unacceptable. Although, it is a real
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
with extensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
precautions this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
can
be overcome
.

In conclusion
, Despite the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in zoos, The advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
zoos outweigh the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
.
In addition
, we have the ability to overcome that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
with extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
precautions.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in zoos. Others believe that there are good reasons for having zoos. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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