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some people think that the government have the duty to ensure its citizens have a healthy diet, while others argue it is the responsibility of each individual. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

some people think that the government have the duty to ensure its citizens have a healthy diet, while others argue it is the responsibility of each individual. v. 1
An often debated topic is whether the government should guarantee food safety for its people. Although there are good reasons to support this, I believe that individuals should be responsible for their meals. A healthy diet depends primarily on foods available in the market, and for this reason it would be necessary for the government to control food sources. Without governmental control, citizens would find it difficult to know which foods are safe for their meals. By imposing food laws, the government can limit the level of additives that food producers use, allowing consumers to eat healthily and reducing the risk of food poisoning. On the other hand, when a person decides what to eat, they do so of their free will, and this should be respected. Some foods are known as unhealthy, but only when people consume them excessively or frequently. For example, the consequences of the intake of fast food are not worth mentioning if we do not eat it regularly. Any involvement of the government with the daily choices would merely restrict the options we have. Furthermore, some people have an allergy to a particular type of foods although it is generally healthy to others. It is unjustified for the government to restrict the consumption of mushrooms just because a few people cannot eat them. From this view, I feel that each person should be responsible for what they eat rather than relying on any policy from the government on food choices. In conclusion, it seems to me that people should bear the responsibility for a healthy diet despite undeniable advantages of governmental control over food choices.
An
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
debated topic is whether the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should guarantee
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
safety for its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Although there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reasons to support this, I believe that individuals should be responsible for their meals.

A healthy diet depends
primarily
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
available in the market, and
for this reason
it would be necessary for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to control
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
sources. Without governmental control, citizens would find it difficult to know which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are safe for their meals. By imposing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
laws, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can limit the level of additives that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
producers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
, allowing consumers to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
healthily
and reducing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
poisoning.

On the other hand
, when a person decides what to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
, they do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
of their free will, and this should
be respected
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are known
as unhealthy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consume them
excessively
or
frequently
.
For example
, the consequences of the intake of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
are not worth mentioning if we do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
it
regularly
. Any involvement of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
with the daily choices would
merely
restrict the options we have.

Furthermore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have an allergy to a particular type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
although it is
generally
healthy to others. It
is unjustified
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to restrict the consumption of mushrooms
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
them. From this view, I feel that each person should be responsible for what they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
rather
than relying on any policy from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
choices.

In conclusion
, it seems to me that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should bear the responsibility for a healthy diet despite undeniable advantages of governmental control over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
choices.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay some people think that the government have the duty to ensure its citizens have a healthy diet, while others argue it is the responsibility of each individual. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
270 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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