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Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however believe that there are better alternative ways to reducing crime. Discuss both views and give our opinion. v.4

Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however believe that there are better alternative ways to reducing crime. v. 4
There is a widespread misconception that if the duration of the prison sentences is augmented, the crime rate can be controlled. However, there are others who challenge the above view and say that, there are various other ways to contain the crime rate in the society. I share my firm opinion with the latter. This essay will share both the views and support my arguments. On one hand, there is no solid determination in controlling the crime rate besides imprisoning people. For example, the countries that strictly follow communist policies are afraid that, if there is an uprising movement commenced by the people against their government, it would unseat their iron fist control over their territorial sovereignty. Owing to this, their judiciary is forced to hand them death sentences or served them long duration of prison sentences, without assessing the reasons behind the uprising movement by the people. If one deeply perceives such judgements, it makes no benefit to contain the crime rate, rather than provoking the people. Thus, the ill-fated judiciary delivers the travesty of justice. On the other hand, there are countries who are concerned about bringing down the crime rate by building a better society. For example, the countries in the Nordic region have begun to close their empty prisons, because people have not committed any crimes since 3 decades. They have achieved this success by providing proper mental and psychological support to the people right from the adolescent age in schools. It is easier to control the misdemeanour by nipping in the bud, rather than allowing it to grow wild. Moreover, these countries have placed tight controls on their population density. Therefore, lesser the number of people will result in lesser the number of crime rates. To recapitulate, crime rate cannot be resisted just by extending the prison punishments. No-one commit crimes voluntarily, only their vulnerabilities forces them to lose their senses and push them to commit crimes. Hence, the society should be rebuilt in such a way that one’s vulnerabilities should be addressed in order to convert a dystopian society into a society of utopia.
There is a widespread misconception that if the duration of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
sentences
is augmented
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
can
be controlled
.
However
, there are others who challenge the above view and say that, there are various other ways to contain the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. I share my firm opinion with the latter. This essay will share both the views and support my arguments.

On one hand, there is no solid determination in controlling the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
besides
imprisoning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
that
strictly
follow communist policies are afraid that, if there is an uprising movement commenced by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
against their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, it would unseat their iron fist control over their territorial sovereignty. Owing to this, their judiciary
is forced
to hand them death sentences or served them long duration of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
sentences, without assessing the reasons behind the uprising movement by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. If one
deeply
perceives such judgements, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
no benefit to contain the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
,
rather
than provoking the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Thus
, the ill-fated judiciary delivers the travesty of justice.

On the other hand
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
who
are concerned
about bringing down the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
by building a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in the Nordic region have begun to close their empty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisons
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have not committed any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
since 3 decades. They have achieved this success by providing proper mental and psychological support to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
right from the adolescent age in schools. It is easier to control the
Possible spelling mistake found.
misdemeanour
by nipping in the bud,
rather
than allowing it to grow wild.
Moreover
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have placed tight controls on their population density.
Therefore
, lesser the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will result in lesser the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates.

To recapitulate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
cannot
be resisted
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by extending the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
punishments. No-one commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
voluntarily
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
their vulnerabilities forces them to lose their senses and push them to commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
.
Hence
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
should be rebuilt in such a way that one’s vulnerabilities should
be addressed
in order to convert a dystopian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
into a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
of utopia.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
36Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however believe that there are better alternative ways to reducing crime. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
350 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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