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Some people think that the best way to increase road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving cars or riding motobikes. To what extend do you agree or disagree? v.7

Some people think that the best way to increase road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving cars or riding motobikes. v. 7
Whether the government should increase the minimum age for using motorized vehicles or not is a major topic of concern in today' s society. While some people believe the lowest legal age would be changed to diminish the danger in road, I am of the opinion that it is not the optimum way to limit traffic accidents. To begin with, there are two reason as to why the legal age for driving cars or riding motorbikes need to be raised. Firstly, being not enough mature and responsible to be full aware of the importance of abide by rules, the young people are likely to break the law and cause the accidents. Moreover, the older people usually more experienced, thereby knowing how to handle dangerous situations while the young ones might be confuse. For example, if a brake of car suddenly stopped working, some youngsters would be panic and could not be navigate their cars, which lead to fatal scenarior. Secondly, in terms of traffic jam, the increasing number of means of transport could be attributed to the low level of age for driving. Therefore, the authorities should reform the law about driving age. However, I am firmly convinced that there are other effective measures to mitigate traffic problems. The first one is that the government should impose heavy taxes on cars, petrol, road rolls. It not only help to reduce the number of engine – powered vehicles, but also make a budget for the government to construct and repair roads. Another measure is upgrading the traffic transports to service inhabitants. Citizens, as a results, could use buses and trans intead of cars and motorbikes. In conclusion, although increasing the legal age for driving cars and riding motorbikes is beneficial in some views, I am strongly believe that there are more feasible soulutions to tackle traffic issues.
Whether the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should increase the minimum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for using motorized vehicles or not is a major topic of concern in
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s society. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe the lowest legal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
to diminish the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
in road, I am of the opinion that it is not the optimum way to limit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
accidents.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are two reason as to why the legal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
or riding motorbikes need to
be raised
.
Firstly
, being not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
mature and responsible to be full aware of the importance of abide by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
, the young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are likely to break the law and cause the accidents.
Moreover
, the older
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
usually
more experienced, thereby knowing how to handle
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
situations while the young ones might be
Consider using the past participle "confused"?
confuse
.
For example
, if a brake of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
suddenly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
working,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
youngsters would be panic and could not be
Consider using a past participle here: "navigated".
navigate
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
, which lead to fatal
Possible spelling mistake found.
scenarior
.
Secondly
, in terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jam, the increasing number of means of transport could
be attributed
to the low level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
.
Therefore
, the authorities should reform the law about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
age.

However
, I am
firmly
convinced that there are other effective measures to mitigate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
problems. The
first
one is that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should impose heavy taxes on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
, petrol, road rolls. It not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the number of engine
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
powered vehicles,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a budget for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to construct and repair roads. Another measure is upgrading the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
transports to service inhabitants. Citizens, as
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a result" or simply "results"?
a results
, could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
buses and trans
Possible spelling mistake found.
intead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
and motorbikes.

In conclusion
, although increasing the legal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
and riding motorbikes is beneficial in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
views, I am
strongly
Consider using a past participle here: "believed".
believe
that there are more feasible
Possible spelling mistake found.
soulutions
to tackle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
issues.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the best way to increase road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving cars or riding motobikes. v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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