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Some people think that the amount of money spent on libraries is a waste as new technologies are developing and replacing library functions. Do you agree or disagree. v.1

Some people think that the amount of money spent on libraries is a waste as new technologies are developing and replacing library functions. v. 1
Library is known to be a prime source of the knowledge and information. But the modern technology has made this source time convenient and easily accessible. At present, the huge investment has made the new technology more advanced and functional. Nevertheless, a contribution to the library can expand a person’s knowledge, wisdom and imagination. The library is regarded as a collection and preservation of the all types of books, magazines, journals and references which comes from the valid and reliable sources. Besides, it has a calm quite atmosphere which comforts the learners. Furthermore, it is a great place for the seekers where they can search and discuss their thoughts and imagination to others. In addition, a librarian is always available whose duty is to help others by providing useful information and books for sometimes. The new technology has occupied the activities of the library and allowed a person to receive library facilities in their home. For example, different international electronic books, publications and journals are now openly accessible in the web pages. Hence, anyone can simply download countless of books in their home without paying any visit to library. Even though it has numerous advantages, one may not enjoy the service unless he has computer and internet with himself. Sometimes it contains fake and invalid sources which deliver false information to the learners. There is no doubt that advance technology has opened up the entrance of the latest news and researches across the world. But only the library has the hidden power to enlarge a person’s intelligence, mind and fantasy. For this reasons, the contribution to the library may encourage and inspire the people learn and seek more.
Library
is known
to be a prime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
of the knowledge and information.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has made this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
time convenient and
easily
accessible. At present, the huge investment has made the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
more advanced and functional.
Nevertheless
, a contribution to the library can expand a person’s knowledge, wisdom and imagination.

The library
is regarded
as a collection and preservation of the all types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, magazines, journals and references which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from the valid and reliable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
.
Besides
, it has a calm quite atmosphere which comforts the learners.
Furthermore
, it is a great place for the seekers where they can search and discuss their thoughts and imagination to others.
In addition
, a librarian is always available whose duty is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
others by providing useful information and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
.

The new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has occupied the activities of the library and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
a person to receive library facilities in their home.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
international electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, publications and journals are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
openly
accessible in the web pages.
Hence
, anyone can
simply
download countless of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in their home without paying any visit to library.
Even though
it has numerous advantages, one may not enjoy the service unless he has computer and internet with himself.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
it contains fake and invalid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
which deliver false information to the learners.

There is no doubt that advance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has opened up the entrance of the latest news and researches across the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the library has the hidden power to enlarge a person’s intelligence, mind and fantasy. For
Did you mean "these"?
this
reasons, the contribution to the library may encourage and inspire the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
learn and seek more.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the amount of money spent on libraries is a waste as new technologies are developing and replacing library functions. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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