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Some people think that technology has made our life too complex However other people think that it has made our life easier Discuss both views and give your opinion v.2

Some people think that technology has made our life too complex However other people think that it has made our life easier 2
There are different perspectives about the development of technologies. While some people believe that technologies have improved people living standards, other people claim that it has caused the complexity in society. Even though there are drawbacks of technologies, I believe that, technologies have created better lifestyles for people than caused the detrimental effects to people. On the one hand, some people said that, technology has made our lives too complicated, because without learning to use of technologies, it would be difficult to survive. For example, booking for a seat in a cinema, coach or taxi is no longer completed over the telephones, but just a touch or click away. Therefore, people have to frequently update and learn to use those technologies and this can create the difficulties. On the other hand, technology has created people’s life easier because it improves the quality of people’s lifestyles. For instance, Tesla introduced driverless cars, so that people would not need to be stressed over traffic jams during commute. Furthermore, the improvement of payment methods, which use embedded sim cards in a phone, enhances the shopping or purchasing easier. Hence, it cannot deny that the technologies have improved the quality of living standards. The fact that, the invention of newer technologies improves people’s living standards worth more than the irritation causing by the complexity use of those devices. The technologies can enable people to complete the work at a faster rate, so people can enjoy their leisure activities, which were impossible to imagine in the past centuries. By 21st century, the average working hours were 40 hours a week compared to 78 hours a week in 1950s. Therefore, this reduction of hours acquired by technological development and people can enjoy their lives during those hours. In conclusion, people have different views about the usefulness of technologies in people’s lifestyles and in my perspective; it brought more benefits than drawbacks.
There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
The usual preposition for "perspectives" is "on" not "about." Revise: "perspectives on".
perspectives about
the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living standards, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that it has caused the complexity in society.
Even though
there are drawbacks of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
, I believe that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
have created better lifestyles for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
than caused the detrimental effects to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
said that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has made our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
too complicated,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
without learning to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
, it would be difficult to survive.
For example
, booking for a seat in a cinema, coach or taxi is no longer completed over the telephones,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a touch or click away.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
frequently
update and learn to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
and this can create the difficulties.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has created
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
life easier
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
lifestyles.
For instance
, Tesla introduced driverless cars,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would not need to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
over traffic jams during commute.
Furthermore
, the improvement of payment methods, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
embedded sim cards in a phone, enhances the shopping or purchasing easier.
Hence
, it cannot deny that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
the quality of living standards.

The fact that, the invention of newer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
living standards worth more than the irritation causing by the complexity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of those devices. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
can enable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to complete the work at a faster rate,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can enjoy their leisure activities, which were impossible to imagine in the past centuries. By 21st century, the average working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
were 40
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
a week compared to 78
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
a week
The article is probably missing here: "in the 1950s".
in 1950s
.
Therefore
, this reduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
acquired by technological development and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can enjoy their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
during those hours.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about the usefulness of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
lifestyles and in my perspective; it brought more benefits than drawbacks.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
31Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that technology has made our life too complex However other people think that it has made our life easier 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
315 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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