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Some people think that schools should teach students to understand about right wrong and good behaviour instead of this being only parents responsibility Do you agree or disagree with this statement v.1

Some people think that schools should teach students to understand about right wrong and good behaviour instead of this being only parents responsibility v. 1
School is a place where students learn both academic skill and moral values. Schools are responsible for pupil’s overall fundamental development. Therefore, I also agree with the statement that teacher should also teach their students to understand about right, wrong and good behaviour. The two places where children can grasp the maximum knowledge are home and school. Children basically learn about behaviour patterns and social interaction, but school provides tremendous knowledge in this regard. Also, education institution is a place where they spend a lot time with their teachers and mate. Therefore, the attitude and manner, which the young students see from their surrounding (form teacher and classmate), stimulus to them to behave in same manner. Consequently, spreading the atmosphere of honesty, decency, politeness and generosity across the school are overarching so that these etiquettes can be crammed into children to the brim. For instance, my uncle’s daughter is just studying 5th class, but she respects the elderly people. Since her mentors taught these qualities which she must inculcate in her. In addition to above, in modern epoch parents of young generation are so busy in earnings that they hardly give the time to their lover. Hence they expect from the institution that in addition to the academic knowledge their children are also taught the civic sense regarding friendly attitude, maintaining the decorum of places like gardens or historical places etc. Furthermore, the parents only are not proving to be effective because demeanour patterns are sometimes being followed wrongly in household. For example, children observe certain acts of their family like talking in a loud tone, spitting on roads, being late for work and so on. Resultantly, they too might pick all these things up. This is why behavioural studies should be handled by school teachers as well. In conclusion, i would say that a teacher would help imbibe ethical principal in children and also help correct any wrong ones that the child may have picked on. Therefore, schools along with other subjects also teach good behaviour.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
where students learn both academic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
and moral values.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Schools
are responsible for pupil’s
overall
fundamental development.
Therefore
, I
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
should
also
teach their students to understand about right,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.

The two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can grasp the maximum knowledge are home and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
basically
learn about
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
patterns and social interaction,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
provides tremendous knowledge in this regard.
Also
, education institution is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
where they spend
If you mean a great quantity, use "a lot of time"?
a lot time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
and mate.
Therefore
, the attitude and manner, which the young students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
from their surrounding (form
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
and classmate), stimulus to them to behave in same manner.
Consequently
, spreading the atmosphere of honesty, decency, politeness and generosity across the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
are overarching
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that these
Possible spelling mistake found.
etiquettes can
be crammed
into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to the brim.
For instance
, my uncle’s daughter is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
studying 5th
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
she respects the elderly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
“Since” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Since
her mentors taught these qualities which she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
inculcate in her.

In addition
to above, in modern epoch parents of young generation are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
busy in earnings that they hardly give the time to their lover.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
from the institution that
in addition
to the academic knowledge their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are
also
taught the civic sense regarding friendly attitude, maintaining the decorum of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
like gardens or historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
etc.
Furthermore
, the parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
are not proving to be effective
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Possible spelling mistake found.
demeanour
patterns are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
being followed
wrongly
in household.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
observe certain acts of their family like talking in a loud tone, spitting on roads, being late for work and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Resultantly
, they too might pick all these things up. This is why
Possible spelling mistake. 'behavioural' is British English.
behavioural
studies should
be handled
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
as well
.

In conclusion
,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would say that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
imbibe ethical principal in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
correct any
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
ones that the child may have picked on.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
along with other subjects
also
teach
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
22Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that schools should teach students to understand about right wrong and good behaviour instead of this being only parents responsibility v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
337 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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