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Some people think that real life skills like cooking, housekeeping and gardening should be included in the curriculum as compulsory subjects? Do you agree or disagree? Explain your opinion, using specific reasons and details. v.2

Some people think that real life skills like cooking, housekeeping and gardening should be included in the curriculum as compulsory subjects? Explain your opinion, using specific reasons and details. v. 2
In order to survive, cooking, housekeeping and gardening are the most essential part for every person’s life. Few people believe that these crucial real life skills are one of the most key part which must be included in regular syllabus as a mandatory subjects. This essay will provide detailed overview of my opinion whether I agree on the same or not and also showcase few valid examples to support my views. In my opinion, I agree that life lessons are necessary to support oneself during any emergency. Firstly, there are some educational organizations which accepts such subjects as obligatory students are bound to learn them just like other subjects. This may help them in future numerous ways. For example, Ramakrishna Mission is following the same concept since it was founded. According to this institution, having knowledge about these household activities provide them a different view. Secondly, these studies are not only provide an another view but also teach one how to manage regular domestic works along with work life. As an example, we often face various difficulties during work life. Mostly, people are unable to manage both lives together. In order to prioritize the work, we don’t get time for gardening or cooking or cleaning house. It is always recommended that one should keep up balance. Otherwise, we will not have time to cook. Our house also needs attention to get clean regular basis or weekly basis. Having a mandatory section for these subjects increase the awareness as well as time management capability from the very early days of one’s life. To summarized, common or regular homemaker job task is recommended to all educational institute to keep it as compulsory to let the youngsters how to manage all of them in even manner during busy life style.
In order to survive, cooking, housekeeping and gardening are the most essential part for every person’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that these crucial real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are one of the most key part which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be included
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regular
syllabus as a mandatory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. This essay will provide detailed overview of my opinion whether I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
on the same or not and
also
showcase few valid examples to support my views.

In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
lessons are necessary to support oneself during any emergency.
Firstly
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
educational organizations which accepts such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
as obligatory students
are bound
to learn them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. This may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them in future numerous ways.
For example
, Ramakrishna Mission is following the same concept since it
was founded
. According to this institution, having knowledge about these household activities provide them a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
view.
Secondly
, these studies are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
provide
One of these determiners is redundant in this context. Choose only one: "a view" or "another view".
an another view
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
teach one how to manage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regular
domestic works along with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. As an example, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
face various difficulties during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Mostly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are unable to manage both
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
together. In order to prioritize the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, we don’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
time for gardening or cooking or cleaning
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.

It is always recommended that one should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up balance.
Otherwise
, we will not have time to cook. Our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
also
needs attention to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
clean
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regular
basis or weekly basis. Having a mandatory section for these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
increase the awareness
as well
as time management capability from the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
early days of one’s life.

To summarized, common or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regular
homemaker job task
is recommended
to all educational institute to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
it as compulsory to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the youngsters how to manage all of them in even manner during busy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
style.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay Some people think that real life skills like cooking, housekeeping and gardening should be included in the curriculum as compulsory subjects? Explain your opinion, using specific reasons and details. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
297 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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