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Some people think that news has no connection with people’s lives; so it is a waste of time to read newspapers and watch television news programs. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people think that news has no connection with people’s lives; so it is a waste of time to read newspapers and watch television news programs. v. 1
It is believed that there is no connection between people’s life and news, so it is time-consuming to read newspaper and watch the television to get more information. In my point of view, I partly agree with this statement because getting the knowledge from the news also has its own benefits. On the one hand, people nowadays are really busy with their work, so there is no leisure time for them to read and watch the news, which is tabloid or fake news, so it will be a waste of time. Moreover, news on TV also likes that, it always repeats the news for a long time, so it would make the viewers feel boring when watching them. So instead of watching those tabloid news they can do many things that helpful to their work. For example, the young people nowadays tend to read news about their idol which does not have any benefits for their studying quality, so if they spend that time on studying, they would have a better life in the future. On the other hand, reading news also brings the benefits for us, if we know how to choose the good news to read. To begin with, the students should read the news relate to the cultural information or scientific knowledge, so it will expand the horizon and they will have a good mark in that field. Moreover, cultural news provides readers the traditional culture of all countries from all over the world, which is a really good tool to ready for the globalization. For example, Discovery channel, which provides the viewers the information about the creature in the natural life, and it will not waste the time on this program. To sum up, although some news is wasting people’s time to follow, it will be a good tendency if the reader can choose the right news to read.
It
is believed
that there is no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
connection between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
life and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is time-consuming to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
newspaper and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the television to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more information. In my point of view, I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
getting the knowledge from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
also
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
nowadays are
really
busy with their work,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
there is no leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, which is tabloid or fake
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will be a waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
on TV
also
likes that, it always repeats the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
for a long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the viewers feel boring when watching them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
instead
of watching those tabloid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
they can do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things that helpful to their work.
For example
, the young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
nowadays tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
about their idol which does not have any benefits for their studying quality,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
if they spend that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on studying, they would have a better life in the future.

On the other hand
, reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
also
brings the benefits for us, if we know how to choose the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the students should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
relate to the cultural information or scientific knowledge,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will expand the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
horizon and
they will have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
mark in that field.
Moreover
, cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
provides readers the traditional culture of all countries from all over the world, which is a
really
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
tool to ready for the globalization.
For example
, Discovery channel, which provides the viewers the information about the creature in the natural life, and it will not waste the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on this program.

To sum up, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is wasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to follow, it will be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
tendency if the reader can choose the right
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
read
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that news has no connection with people’s lives; so it is a waste of time to read newspapers and watch television news programs. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
313 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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