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Some people think news has no connection to people's lives, so it is a waste of time to read the news in newspapers and watch television news programs. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

Some people think news has no connection to people's lives, so it is a waste of time to read the news in newspapers and watch television news programs. v. 2
In the contemporary world, the individuals have been becoming coated with the replete amount of material. It is considered that some news is incongruous to people’s lives and it would be worthless spend of time to reading or watching about status quo. Analysing both the ability of news to be indispensable, helping acquire wisdom as well as these tidings allow residents to become acquainted and estimate a current situation. To commence with, the newspapers and TV programs are the main source of up-to-date reports. It is believed that these announcements allow the public to preclude from detrimental accidents. For instance, the news about car wrecks or robberies might forestall them with their valuables and can lead to shrinkages of the number of committing crimes. Furthermore, TV reports consist a tremendous of considerable information. The society would have a chance to acquire knowledge in various aspects of their lives. The media can muster global issues of current civilization and the solutions for them, which are essential to be more intelligent. Therefore, the main sources of news play a crucial role in introducing renewed instruction and alerting dwellers. Additionally, these reportings allow individuals to be familiar with first-hand ones related to occurring worldwide. The informative news literacy helps students to expand their horizons and improve awareness of cultural and religious diversity, which impact positively. For example, reading newspapers will improve their knowledge in general and it might be easy for interaction with other people about current events and politics. Owing to these possibilities, the society can assess the latest situations and get some useful know-how or advice for them. Hence, the media include an overwhelming information that would be useful for a variety of observers, allowing them to learn something from devastating happenings. To recapitulate, reading or watching the news is essential to become familiar with current situations. Because of improving conversion, the public would have more sapience to evaluate and understand some aspects of life. I believe that acquainted with current accidents and alerting crimes allow people to eradicate these occurrences, behaving befittingly.
In the contemporary world, the individuals have been becoming coated with the replete amount of material. It
is considered
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is incongruous to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and it would be worthless spend of time to reading or watching about status quo.
Possible spelling mistake. 'Analysing' is British English.
Analysing
both the ability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
to be indispensable, helping acquire wisdom
Probable usage error. Use "and" after 'both'.
as well as
these tidings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
residents to become acquainted and estimate a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
current
situation.

To commence with, the newspapers and TV programs are the main source of up-to-date reports. It
is believed
that these announcements
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
the public to preclude from detrimental accidents.
For instance
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
about car wrecks or robberies might forestall them with their valuables and can lead to
Possible spelling mistake found.
shrinkages
of the number of committing crimes.
Furthermore
, TV reports consist
The phrase 'a tremendous of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'a' and 'of'.
a tremendous of
considerable information. The society would have a chance to acquire knowledge in various aspects of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. The media can muster global issues of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
current
civilization and the solutions for them, which are essential to be more intelligent.
Therefore
, the main sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
play a crucial role in introducing renewed instruction and alerting dwellers.

Additionally
, these reportings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
individuals to be familiar with
first
-hand ones related to occurring worldwide. The informative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
literacy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
students to expand their horizons and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
awareness of cultural and religious diversity, which impact
positively
.
For example
, reading newspapers will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their knowledge
in general
and it might be easy for interaction with other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
current
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and politics. Owing to these possibilities, the society can assess the latest situations and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
useful know-how or advice for them.
Hence
, the media include
'information' is a mass noun (i.e., uncountable). Therefore, the preceding 'an' is probably wrong.
an overwhelming information
that would be useful for a variety of observers, allowing them to learn something from devastating happenings.

To recapitulate, reading or watching the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is essential to become familiar with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
current
situations.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of improving conversion, the public would have more sapience to evaluate and understand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
aspects of life. I believe that acquainted with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
current
accidents and alerting crimes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to eradicate these occurrences, behaving
befittingly
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think news has no connection to people's lives, so it is a waste of time to read the news in newspapers and watch television news programs. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
342 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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