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Some people think that keeping pets is good for children while others think it is dangerous and unhealthy. Which opinion do you agree with? Discuss both options and give examples. v.2

Some people think that keeping pets is good for children while others think it is dangerous and unhealthy. Which opinion do you agree with? v. 2
Whether to have a pet or not remains a controversial issue. While some people are against having pets, in my opinion, domestic animals have a positive impact on our physical and psychological health and wellbeing. Also they make great companions for our children. People who are against having pets argue that playing with them can cause serious health problems in human beings especially children. Of course, there are people who keep spiders and snakes as their pets. These creatures are certainly dangerous and pose considerable threat to the life of their owners. However, the vast majority of pets do not belong to this category. Another argument against keeping pets is that they can cause skin allergies and aggravate bronchial asthma. These health concerns are real and I feel that people who are susceptible to them should stay away from animals. Animal rights activists also claim that keeping pets away from their natural habitats will affect their health and the food chain. However, in my opinion, if their owners take good care of them, keeping them at home is unlikely to have any adverse impact on their health. While it is true that keeping a pet may have some ill effects on our health, the benefits of having one are more significant. Pets improve our mood and health. Playing with the pets or taking them for a walk will keep both children and adults fit and healthy. What’s more, most people keep dogs, cats and fish; however, serious accidents caused by pets remain rare and statistically insignificant. Last but not the least, having a pet makes children more responsible. They learn to take care of another life and also become more sensitive, caring and sympathetic. To sum up, although there are some minor drawbacks to owning a pet, in my opinion, the advantages of having a pet are far more significant. Pets make great companions and prevent depression in children and adults.
Whether to have a pet or not remains a controversial issue. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
, in my opinion, domestic animals have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on our physical and psychological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
great companions for our children.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
who are against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
argue that playing with them can cause serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems in human beings
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Of course
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
spiders and snakes as their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
. These creatures are
certainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
and pose considerable threat to the life of their owners.
However
, the vast majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
do not belong to this category. Another argument against keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
is that they can cause skin allergies and aggravate bronchial asthma. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
concerns are real and I feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are susceptible to them should stay away from animals. Animal rights activists
also
claim that keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
away from their natural habitats will affect their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and the food chain.
However
, in my opinion, if their owners take
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
care of them, keeping them at home is unlikely to have any adverse impact on their health.

While it is true that keeping a pet may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
ill effects on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
, the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
one are more significant.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our mood and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. Playing with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
or taking them for a walk will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and adults fit and healthy. What’s more, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
dogs, cats and fish;
however
, serious accidents caused by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
remain rare and
statistically
insignificant. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a pet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
more responsible. They learn to take care of another life and
also
become more sensitive, caring and sympathetic.

To sum up, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
minor drawbacks to owning a pet, in my opinion, the advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a pet are far more significant.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
great companions and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
depression in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and adults.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that keeping pets is good for children while others think it is dangerous and unhealthy. Which opinion do you agree with? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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