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Governments should be responsible for funding and controlling scientific research rather than private organisations. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

Governments should be responsible for funding and controlling scientific research rather than private organisations. v. 2
It is the responsibility of a government to finance and control scientific research, and private organizations should not be the one doing it. I completely agree with this school of thought because without financial stress the research team can work with complete focus, and the success of any research benefits the country’s economy and status. Firstly, if the government of a country will provide funds for the research work, the organizations working on the trials will be stress-free and can maintain its focus solely on their work. This will result in a timely completed successful research without any hindrance that could have occurred because of the financial matters. For example, it was reported by The Clinical Trial Association that around 72% of the government supported researches complete successfully because the trial team have sufficient funds to work on their research without any waiting period which normally happens when supported by the private organizations. Moreover, the results of a successful research ultimately benefit the country’s status and economy all over the world. That is to say that if a government is going to receive the benefits of a successful trial, then it should be its responsibility to take care of the expenses needed to perform that research. For instance, it is reported by the World Medical Association that the US is the largest supplier of the cancer medications which are researched, made and marketed by the US government itself. In conclusion, any scientific research should be supported financially by the respective government because the research team can give their best to their work if there is no tension about the expense occurring on the trial, and at the end, a successful research increases the fame and economical status of the government itself.
It is the responsibility of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to finance and control scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
, and private organizations should not be the one doing it. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this school of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
without financial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
team can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with complete focus, and the success of any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
benefits the country’s economy and status.

Firstly
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
of a country will provide funds for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, the organizations working on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trials
will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
-free and can maintain its focus
solely
on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. This will result in a timely completed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
without any hindrance that could have occurred
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the financial matters.
For example
, it
was reported
by The Clinical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Trial
Association that around 72% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
supported
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
researches
complete
successfully
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trial
team have sufficient funds to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
without any waiting period which
normally
happens when supported by the private organizations.

Moreover
, the results of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
ultimately
benefit the country’s status and economy all over the world.
That is
to say that if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is going to receive the benefits of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trial
, then it should be its responsibility to take care of the expenses needed to perform that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
.
For instance
, it
is reported
by the World Medical Association that the US is the largest supplier of the cancer medications which
are researched
, made and marketed by the US
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
itself.

In conclusion
, any scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
should
be supported
financially
by the respective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
team can give their best to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
if there is no tension about the expense occurring on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trial
, and at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
increases the fame and
Did you mean "economic" (=connected with economy)?
economical
status of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
itself.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Governments should be responsible for funding and controlling scientific research rather than private organisations. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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