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Some people think that it is important to have a single language as an international official language. Others think that it will make it difficult to identify countries and would cause a loss of culture. v.2

Some people think that it is important to have a single language as an international official language. Others think that it will make it difficult to identify countries and would cause a loss of culture. v. 2
With the advent of globalisation, a common language to facilitate trade and communication seems inevitable. Some oppose the development of a single language on the grounds that it may lead to cultural erosion and a loss of local linguistic knowledge. Yet, I am of the opinion that it is possible to use an official international language and still retain one’s own language and culture. Firstly, many countries already use an official language or languages. For example, in India, there are two official languages: Hindi and English. In a country such as India where there are innumerable languages spoken, there is a need for official languages to ensure communication between different sections of the population and the different states. In China, where different dialects are spoken, Mandarin, the official language, enables people from different provinces to comprehend each other. Secondly, in an age of rampant globalisation, there is no doubt that an international language is inevitable. How is an African businessman going to conduct businesses in China when there are such differences between their languages? In this sense, not only is an international language inevitable, but also a necessity for trade, commerce and economic expansion in the 21st century. The critics opposing the adoption of an international official language argue that it would lead to a loss of cultural identity. However, the use of an international official language doesn’t mean that local languages will die out. For example, English already functions as a kind of unofficial international language but this doesn’t mean that people solely converse in English or they neglect their own language. English is used in specific contexts (trade, business, etc) and native languages are used for everyday instruction. In brief, as the world becomes smaller the need for an official international language seems unavoidable. English has already assumed this role although its status is unofficial. In my view, the use of either an official or unofficial international language is necessary to facilitate communication in a time of rapid globalisation.
With the advent of
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
, a common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
to facilitate trade and communication seems inevitable.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
oppose the development of a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
on the grounds that it may lead to cultural erosion and a loss of local linguistic knowledge.
Yet
, I am of the opinion that it is possible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
and
still
retain one’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
and culture.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries already
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
or
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languages
.
For example
, in India, there are two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
: Hindi and English. In a country such as India where there are innumerable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
spoken, there is a need for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
to ensure communication between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
sections of the population and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
states. In China, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
dialects
are spoken
, Mandarin, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, enables
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
provinces to comprehend each other.

Secondly
, in an age of rampant
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
, there is no doubt that an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is inevitable. How is an African businessman going to conduct businesses in China when there are such differences between their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
? In this sense, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
is an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
inevitable,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
a necessity for trade, commerce and economic expansion in the 21st century.

The critics opposing the adoption of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
argue that it would lead to a loss of cultural identity.
However
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
doesn’t mean that local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
out.
For example
, English already functions as a kind of unofficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this doesn’t mean that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
solely
converse in
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
English or
they neglect their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
. English is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in specific contexts (trade, business, etc) and native
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for everyday instruction.

In brief
, as the world becomes smaller the need for an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
seems unavoidable. English has already assumed this role although its status is unofficial. In my view, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of either an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
official
or unofficial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is necessary to facilitate communication in a time of rapid
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
42Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that it is important to have a single language as an international official language. Others think that it will make it difficult to identify countries and would cause a loss of culture. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
331 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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