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Some people think that it is better to travel as part of a tour group when theyare visiting foreign country. Other people prefer to make their own travel plans sothat they can independently. Which approach do you think is better and why? v.1

Some people think that it is better to travel as part of a tour group when theyare visiting foreign country. Other people prefer to make their own travel plans sothat they can independently. Which approach do you think is better and why? v. 1
Industries and building sector have led to a growing issue with the decline in the quality of air and water in a lot of developing nations. These challenges can be solved by enacting and implementing laws and focusing on sources of energy that do not harm the atmosphere, but, still provide energy to power our economies. On the one hand, as far as improving the quality of water is concerned, solutions such as stricter guidelines and laws would play a major role in helping curb this problem. In other words, there should be stringent implementation of rules on proper disposal of industrial waste into waterways, since they are the major source of water pollution. If construction and major corporations do not follow these laws, hefty penalties should be imposed, so that it sets a precedent and deters others from doing the same. They should be forced to implement proper treatment of chemical and other waste, before it is discharged, thus helping improve the health of water bodies and consequently the eco-system depends on it. On the other hand, to improve the quality of air and tackle the negative impact of industries and building sector on it, focus and emphasis should be placed on alternative energy use and reduction of harmful emissions into the atmosphere. The current proliferation of the use of fossil fuels has to be curtailed and aggressively implement switching to alternate sources of energy such as solar, wind and fuel cells, since these sources are environmentally friendly and sustainable, as such, will help reverse the detrimental impact of greenhouse gasses on earths atmosphere and restore the quality of air. Furthermore, stricter emissions protocols for industries and construction should be implemented and enforced, so that they use technology to limit the content of emissions to a safe level and thus benefiting the air quality. In conclusion, the challenges faced by the reduction of quality of air and water can be resolved by a combination of laws and guidelines along with a focus on renewable sources of power and reducing the dependence on traditional sources.
Industries and building sector have led to a growing issue with the decline in the
quality
of
air
and
water
in
a lot of
developing nations. These challenges can
be solved
by enacting and implementing
laws
and focusing on
sources
of
energy
that do not harm the atmosphere,
but
,
still
provide
energy
to power our economies.

On the one hand, as far as improving the
quality
of
water
is concerned
, solutions such as stricter guidelines and
laws
would play a major role in helping curb this problem. In
other
words, there should be stringent implementation of
rules
on proper disposal of industrial waste into waterways, since they are the major
source
of
water
pollution. If construction and major corporations do not follow these
laws
, hefty penalties should
be imposed
,
so
that it sets a precedent and deters others from doing the same. They should
be forced
to implement proper treatment of chemical and
other
waste,
before
it
is discharged
,
thus
helping
improve
the health of
water
bodies and
consequently
the
eco-system
depends on it.

On the
other
hand, to
improve
the
quality
of
air
and tackle the
negative
impact of industries and building sector on it, focus and emphasis should
be placed
on alternative
energy
use
and reduction of harmful emissions into the atmosphere. The
current
proliferation of the
use
of fossil fuels
has to
be curtailed
and
aggressively
implement switching to alternate
sources
of
energy
such as solar, wind and fuel cells, since these
sources
are
environmentally
friendly and sustainable, as such, will
help
reverse the detrimental impact of greenhouse gasses on earths atmosphere and restore the
quality
of
air
.
Furthermore
, stricter emissions protocols for industries and construction should
be implemented
and enforced,
so
that they
use
technology to limit the content of emissions to a safe level and
thus
benefiting the
air
quality.

In conclusion
, the challenges faced by the reduction of
quality
of
air
and
water
can
be resolved
by a combination of
laws
and guidelines along with a focus on renewable
sources
of power and reducing the dependence on traditional
sources
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that it is better to travel as part of a tour group when theyare visiting foreign country. Other people prefer to make their own travel plans sothat they can independently. Which approach do you think is better and why? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
345 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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