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Some people think that it is better for a country's economy for people to spend money while others believe that it would be better for people to save money. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. v.4

Some people think that it is better for a country's economy for people to spend money while others believe that it would be better for people to save money. v. 4
Money is an important factor in the livelihood of a person. People earn money with their constant efforts. They need to save their wealth to achieve their future goals. Also the amount they spend in fulfilling their desires, help the nation to grow its economy. However, there are mixed views on whether a person should spend more to help the country's economy or save more. This essay will be putting light on both of the scenarios. The nation's economy is driven by demand and supply model. The more will be the demand, the more will be the supply, hence more economic growth for the country. How country's economy will be affected with more demand? Well, let's take an example of wooden bed, which is the basic necessity for every human being. The more will be the requirement, the more labourers will be put into building the beds, further helping the country in eradicating unemployment, hence improving overall economic growth. People do a lot of hard work to earn their livelihood. Therefore, they tend to save more than spending. However, it is fine not to spend too much on luxury items. For example, if public transport is available to go from one place to another, then people generally don't spend money on buying their own vehicle and save it for other important purposes. In my opinion, I think people should spend wisely. They should spend well enough on necessary items. Also, people should save for any unforeseen circumstances, that may come in future.
Money is an
important
factor in the livelihood of a person.
People
earn money with their constant efforts. They need to
save
their wealth to achieve their future goals.
Also
the amount they
spend
in fulfilling their desires,
help
the nation to grow its
economy
.
However
, there
are mixed
views on whether a person should
spend
more to
help
the country's
economy
or
save
more. This essay will be putting light on both of the scenarios.

The nation's
economy
is driven
by demand and supply model. The more will be the demand, the more will be the supply,
hence
more economic growth for the country. How country's
economy
will be
affected
with more demand? Well,
let
's take an example of wooden bed, which is the basic necessity for every human being. The more will be the requirement, the more
labourers
will
be put
into building the beds,
further
helping the country in eradicating unemployment,
hence
improving
overall
economic growth.

People
do
a lot of
hard
work to earn their livelihood.
Therefore
, they tend to
save
more than spending.
However
, it is fine not to
spend
too much on luxury items.
For example
, if public transport is available to go from one place to another, then
people
generally
don't
spend
money on buying their
own
vehicle and
save
it for other
important
purposes.

In my opinion, I
think
people
should
spend
wisely
. They should
spend
well
enough
on necessary items.
Also
,
people
should
save
for any unforeseen circumstances, that may
come
in future
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that it is better for a country's economy for people to spend money while others believe that it would be better for people to save money. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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