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Some people think that giving money as gift to teenagers is good while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.6

Some people think that giving money as gift to teenagers is good while others disagree. v. 6
One of the most controversial issues today is, whether it is a wise decision to gift money to youngsters or not. In this essay, we will discuss both sides, along with the evidence on why it is not a great idea to provide cash as a present. On one side of the argument, there are people who support that giving monetary gifts to teens is good. The main reason for this is that it is more adequate because teenagers can buy any items according to their choice from that gifted amount. Youth these days are very much picky on what they want or they do not want. Therefore, it is simple for the person who is gifting to provide cash so that the child can get themselves the present of their choice. For instance, if a school going teen is gifted cash, they can invest in things that are useful for them for education or learning. On the other hand, it can have an adverse impact as well. Minors can sometimes not be the right decision-maker and may end up spending on a health hazardous substance. Seeing money can make some teenagers tempt to purchase items that can lead them to a worse path in life. For example, if a youngster who does not acknowledge the meaning of the present may end up buying addictive things like drugs or cigarettes. Hence, providing money as a gift, can sometimes be harmful to youths. In conclusion, both arguments have their merits. However, in my perspective, gifting money to teenagers can sometimes lead them towards the wrong path as they are still minors and are not mature enough to make a decision for themselves.
One of the most controversial issues
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
is, whether it is a wise decision to gift
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to youngsters or not. In this essay, we will discuss both sides, along with the evidence on why it is not a great
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
to provide cash as a present.

On one side of the argument, there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who support that giving monetary gifts to teens is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
. The main reason for this is that it is more adequate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
any items according to their choice from that gifted amount. Youth these days are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much picky on what they
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
want or
they do not want.
Therefore
, it is simple for the person who is gifting to provide cash
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the child can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
themselves the present of their choice.
For instance
, if a school going teen
is gifted
cash, they can invest in things that are useful for them for education or learning.

On the other hand
, it can have an adverse impact
as well
. Minors can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
not be the right decision-maker and may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up spending on a health hazardous substance. Seeing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
tempt to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
items that can lead them to a worse path in life.
For example
, if a youngster who does not acknowledge the meaning of the present may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up buying addictive things like drugs or cigarettes.
Hence
, providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
as a gift, can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
be harmful to youths.

In conclusion
, both arguments have their merits.
However
, in my perspective, gifting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
lead them towards the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
path as they are
still
minors and are not mature
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a decision for themselves.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Some people think that giving money as gift to teenagers is good while others disagree. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
281 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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