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Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possible. While others think that it should not start until 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possible. While others think that it should not start until 7 years of age. v. 1
Around the world, starting formal education for the children and the appropriate age for it is a widely debated topic. Opinions vary on whether to start formal education for children at the earliest or delay it until the age of 7 years. This essay will analyse both arguments with relevant examples and an opinion would be formed at the end. Firstly, some people think that children are sharp and active learners. So, formal education should be started as soon as possible. It is argued that, despite the initial difficulty, children grasp basic subjects and their concepts efficiently at a young age that could prove pivotal to their future success. For instance, in my country, there is a school in which children are introduced to formal academia at the age of 4-5 years. Interestingly, the school records have shown excellent results with their students being top performers in board exams in comparison to other schools. Therefore, it can be said that starting formal education as earlier as possible could furnish impressive results. On the other hand, some people believe that proper academic courses should not be started for children until they are seven as it will hinder their other potential talents. For example, In America, students are not taught formal course until they turn eight. It is done in order to polish their all-round learning and potential talent. From the analysis of American education system, it seems to be quite a productive approach as they have produced numerous scientists, athletes sportsmen, entrepreneurs and other professionals. Hence, it is evident that formal education after 7 has delivered excellent results. From the above discussion, it can be concluded that formal education after seven years of age is more beneficial as it has produced far better results in comparison to a start prior to that. It is, therefore, hoped that in order to nourish and realize different talents of children in different fields, parents will commence their formal education after age seven.
Around the world, starting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and the appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
for it is a
widely
debated topic. Opinions vary on whether to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
at the earliest or delay it until the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 7 years. This essay will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
both arguments with relevant examples and an opinion would
be formed
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are sharp and active learners.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible. It
is argued
that, despite the initial difficulty,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
grasp basic subjects and their concepts
efficiently
at a young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
that could prove pivotal to their future success.
For instance
, in my country, there is a school in which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are introduced
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
academia at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 4-5 years.
Interestingly
, the school records have shown excellent results with their students being top performers in board exams
in comparison
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
schools.
Therefore
, it can
be said
that starting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
as
Did you mean "early"?
earlier
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
as
possible could furnish impressive results.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that proper academic courses should not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
until they are seven as it will hinder their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
potential talents.
For example
, In America, students are not taught
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
course until they turn eight. It
is done
in order to polish their all-round learning and potential talent. From the analysis of American
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
system, it seems to be quite a productive approach as they have produced numerous scientists, athletes sportsmen, entrepreneurs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
professionals.
Hence
, it is evident that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
after 7 has delivered excellent results.

From the above discussion, it can
be concluded
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
after seven years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
is more beneficial as it has produced far better results
in comparison
to a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
prior to that. It is,
therefore
, hoped that in order to nourish and realize
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
talents of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
fields, parents will commence their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
seven.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Knowledge of languages is the doorway to wisdom.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possible. While others think that it should not start until 7 years of age. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
328 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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