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Some people think that climate change could have a negative effect on business. Other people think that climate change could create more business opportunities. Discuss both views give your own opinion. v.1

Some people think that climate change could have a negative effect on business. Other people think that climate change could create more business opportunities. v. 1
It is irrefutable that climatic change is one of the major concerns across the globe today. While one section of the society consider this as an opportunity for creating and expanding businesses, others see this as a drawback for them. This essay will juxtapose both these views, and finally conclude with my opinion. With the dramatic change in the weather patterns, the tourism industry has been harshly hit. Owing to unexpected rise and fall in temperatures in most of the parts of the world, such as extreme weather conditions in India, where summers are as warm as 50 degrees Celsius and in winters mercury level drops to nearly freezing 0 degrees Celsius, tourists do not prefer to visit such places. Consequently, local businesses and overall economy dependent on tourism gets detrimentally affected. On the contrary, few businesses such as air conditioner manufactures, fans and heaters manufacturing companies see this as a good time to boost their business as the demand of their products shoot up due to climatic change and consequently they have to increase the supply as well. Their agenda becomes very clear and their business potentially increases in such conditions. In conclusion, though few businesses gain from the climate change, I believe the majority has a perilous effect on them. Climate change is a very dangerous issue which will negatively affect each one of us, even those who are gaining profit from it today. Hence, we all should have a provident approach towards it and be solicitous about our future.
It is irrefutable that climatic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is one of the major concerns across the globe
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. While one section of the society consider this as an opportunity for creating and expanding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
this as a drawback for them. This essay will juxtapose both these views, and
finally
conclude with my opinion.

With the dramatic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
in the weather patterns, the tourism industry has been
harshly
hit. Owing to unexpected rise and fall in temperatures in most of the parts of the world, such as extreme weather conditions in India, where summers are as warm as 50 degrees Celsius and in winters mercury level drops to
nearly
freezing 0 degrees Celsius, tourists do not prefer to visit such places.
Consequently
, local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
and
overall
economy dependent on tourism
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
detrimentally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
.

On the contrary
, few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
such as air conditioner manufactures, fans and heaters manufacturing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
this as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
time to boost their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
as the demand of their products shoot up due to climatic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
and
consequently
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
increase the supply
as well
. Their agenda becomes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
potentially
increases in such conditions.

In conclusion
, though few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
businesses
gain from the climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
, I believe the majority has a perilous effect on them. Climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
issue which will
negatively
affect each one of us, even those who are gaining profit from it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
Hence
, we all should have a provident approach towards it and be solicitous about our future.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay Some people think that climate change could have a negative effect on business. Other people think that climate change could create more business opportunities. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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