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Some people think that cars are the best way to travel in a city, while others think that bicycles are better. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

Some people think that cars are the best way to travel in a city, while others think that bicycles are better. v. 1
Nowadays, in modern cities, the acceptable mode of transportation is still a debatable topic. It is believed that cars are the most convenient means of transports, while others state that bicycles are better alternatives. Although both of the modes have some advantages and drawbacks, I think that bicycles are better for our health and environment. On the one hand, the reason that most people choose automobiles instead of two- wheels is it saves time to travel in urban. Driving a car is also not a physically strenuous activity which helps people saving energy. In contrast, bicycles made driver waste more energy and times. For example, one of my relatives lives far from me, about 10 km, it will take me 1 or 2 hours if I go there by two- wheels. But if I use a car instead, I can reach there approximate 30 minutes. Moreover, someone driving four-wheel vehicles is not exposed to harsh weather. In this way, these cars have made our life simpler. On the other hand, there is a common belief that the use of bicycles positively affects our health and environment. Firstly, bicycles eco-friendly means of transportation. Cycling just needs human strength and requires no gasoline and petrol. Therefore, no harmful vehicle emissions or smog is released into the air. Secondly, in the process of riding, humans burn out excess fat and release toxins from their bodies; thus, making for healthier cities and fitter people. For instance, a study showed that a daily 30 minute bicycle ride can mitigate the risk of hypertension, diabetes and bad lipid disorders. Therefore, in that pollution cities, people should pay more attention to eco-friendly options like bicycles. To conclude, although cars are faster mode of transport to be used in a city, bicycles are the best choice in favourable weather conditions which are more environmentally efficient and can also save a lot of money
Nowadays, in modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, the acceptable mode of transportation is
still
a debatable topic. It
is believed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
are the most convenient means of transports, while others state that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bicycles
are better alternatives. Although both of the modes have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages and drawbacks, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bicycles
are better for our health and environment.

On the one hand, the reason that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose automobiles
instead
of two- wheels is it saves time to travel in urban. Driving a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is
also
not a
physically
strenuous activity which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
saving energy.
In contrast
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bicycles
made driver waste more energy and times.
For example
, one of my relatives
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
far from me, about 10 km, it will take me 1 or 2 hours if I go there by two- wheels.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
if I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
instead
, I can reach there approximate 30 minutes.
Moreover
, someone driving four-wheel vehicles is not exposed to harsh weather. In this way, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
have made our life simpler.

On the other hand
, there is a common belief that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bicycles
positively
affects our health and environment.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bicycles
eco-friendly means of transportation. Cycling
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
needs human strength and requires no gasoline and petrol.
Therefore
, no harmful vehicle emissions or smog
is released
into the air.
Secondly
, in the process of riding, humans burn out excess
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
and release toxins from their bodies;
thus
, making for healthier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and fitter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For instance
, a study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that a daily
When a number forms part of an adjectival compound, use a hyphen: "30-minute"
30 minute
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bicycle
ride can mitigate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of hypertension, diabetes and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
lipid disorders.
Therefore
, in that pollution
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should pay more attention to eco-friendly options like bicycles.

To conclude
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
are faster mode of transport to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in a city,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bicycles
are the best choice in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
weather conditions which are more
environmentally
efficient and can
also
save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that cars are the best way to travel in a city, while others think that bicycles are better. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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