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Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree? v.10

Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. v. 10
Voluntary works are thought to be beneficial to both students and the community, thus some people insist that it should be mandatory for adolescent to contribute their spare time into social activities. Personally, I completely agree with this suggestion as I believe that it would foster the growth of both citizens and society. The majority of teenagers nowadays prefer to stay indoors rather than be active and participate in outdoor activity, hence through mandatory volunteering they would interact more with local people and the environment. It is likely that they would progressively become more active and socialize as they form healthy habits with new friends. By going to various places, they have the chance to comprehend different walk of lives and neighbourhoods. Moreover, students would learn valuable lessons involving in the activities. For instance, if they volunteer at nursing home, they would learn to respect and take care of their grandparents. As the young become more enthusiastic in the community, the society as a whole will develop strong and affectionately. The disable and elderly will have someone that takes care of them daily or weekly which would improve their physical and mental health. Rate of pollution certainly will decline since teenagers have acknowledged its detrimental effect through practical voluntary trips. Juvenile crimes would not be a major problem as most of the students are working to help others in their free time. In conclusion, voluntary activities encourage personal and communal development in a multitude of facets. Cities should implement social work for students to strengthen their skills and bond the community relationship.
Voluntary works are
thought
to be beneficial to both
students
and the community,
thus
some
people
insist that it should be mandatory for adolescent to contribute their spare time into social
activities
.
Personally
, I completely
agree
with this suggestion as I believe that it would foster the growth of both citizens and society.

The majority of
teenagers
nowadays prefer to stay indoors
rather
than be active and participate in outdoor
activity
,
hence
through mandatory volunteering they would interact more with local
people
and the environment. It is likely that they would
progressively
become more active and socialize as they form healthy habits with new friends. By going to various places, they have the chance to comprehend
different
walk of
lives
and
neighbourhoods
.
Moreover
,
students
would learn valuable lessons involving in the
activities
.
For instance
, if they volunteer at nursing home, they would learn to respect and take care of their grandparents.

As the young become more enthusiastic in the community, the society as a whole will develop strong and
affectionately
.
The disable
and elderly will have someone that takes care of them daily or weekly which would
improve
their physical and mental health. Rate of pollution
certainly
will decline since
teenagers
have acknowledged its detrimental effect through practical voluntary trips. Juvenile crimes would not be a major problem as most of the
students
are working to
help
others in their free time.

In conclusion
, voluntary
activities
encourage personal and communal development in a multitude of facets. Cities should implement social work for
students
to strengthen their
skills
and bond the community relationship.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that all teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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