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Some people think that a good diet and exercise are not necessary for a health and long life. To what extent do you agree or disagree. ? v.1

Some people think that a good diet and exercise are not necessary for a health and long life. ? v. 1
There is a lingering debate over whether having a healthy diet and exercise contributes to a healthy life; some people argue that keeping a good diet and exercise is not critical elements for a healthy and long life. To see if this statement holds water, we must take numerous perspectives into account before making the decision. There is no difficulty in understanding why a good diet is vital to a healthy and long life. The consumption of high calories, unsaturated fats, and high sugar-containing drinks poses a threat to their body health; moreover, it may lead to obesity, high blood pressure, or heart attack. For example, individuals nowadays are accustomed to eating junk food, which contains too much oil and salt. In the long term, they may end up being obese or suffering from cardiovascular illnesses. However, to avoid these healthy problemes, following a wholesome diet, including green vegetables, dry fruits, and lean meat, is essential. A balanced eating habit offers protection from illnesses and enhances the longevity of people. On the other hand, exercise also stands as a pivotal factor for a healthy life. Working out every day benefits the body in significant ways. For one thing, it strengthens our immune system, preventing us from contacting cold or other illnesses. Exercise, furthermore, increases the stamina to perform vigorous activities and keeps joints moving. It also aids in digestion, sleep, and elimination of toxins out of the body. In other words, it cleases the body and unwinds us from preesure. Therefore, exercise helps us spend a disease-free long life. To sum up, from my perspective, given the merit inherent in a nutritious diet and exercise, a wholesome diet and exercise play a vital role in a long and healthy life.
There is a lingering debate over whether having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
contributes to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that keeping a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
diet and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
is not critical elements for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
if this statement holds water, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
take numerous perspectives into account
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
making the decision.

There is no difficulty in understanding why a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
diet is vital to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. The consumption of high calories, unsaturated fats, and high sugar-containing drinks poses a threat to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
health;
moreover
, it may lead to obesity, high blood pressure, or heart attack.
For example
, individuals nowadays
are accustomed
to eating junk food, which contains too much oil and salt. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
term, they may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up being obese or suffering from cardiovascular illnesses.
However
, to avoid these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "problems", the plural form of the noun 'problem'?
problemes
, following a wholesome diet, including green vegetables, dry fruits, and lean meat, is essential. A balanced eating habit offers protection from illnesses and enhances the longevity of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
also
stands as a pivotal factor for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Working out every day benefits the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
in significant ways. For one thing, it strengthens our immune system, preventing us from contacting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
or other illnesses.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Exercise
,
furthermore
, increases the stamina to perform vigorous activities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
joints moving. It
also
aids in digestion, sleep, and elimination of toxins out of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
.
In other words
, it
Possible spelling mistake found.
cleases
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
and unwinds us from
Possible spelling mistake found.
preesure
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us spend a disease-free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
life.

To sum up, from my perspective,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the merit inherent in a nutritious diet and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
, a wholesome diet and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
play a vital role in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that a good diet and exercise are not necessary for a health and long life. ? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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