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Some people think it would be better for large companies and industries to move out to regional areas outside large urban centers. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

Some people think it would be better for large companies and industries to move out to regional areas outside large urban centers. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
Relocating companies from urban area to suburban region has been progressively increasing over the decade. Although establishments often struggle with security and infrastructure, while in the rural sector, they will also get their hands on low cost land, nonetheless, they can create significant employment opportunity for the people around there. In my opinion, industries are far better off relocated to less developed areas, despite the challenges they will inevitably face. The greatest benefits of relocating are the companies can create considerable employment opportunities in these areas that will eventually improve the condition of the resident that would be impossible, if they had only slight work opportunities. Being in rural areas the companies can get economies of the scale through expanding their operations on inexpensive land rather they can use those available funds for extensive research and development, For example, In 2010, MGM had moved to ruler area results in cost saving against expensive rents, moreover, they brought in new products to market by diverting those funds to research and development. The main challenges the establishment will face while moving out to remote areas are usually from lack of transportation infrastructure and security, additionally, these differences can pose a massive obstacle for them because one has to move beyond their capabilities and expertise to manage the said issues whereas they execute considerable measures to cope with the inconvenience. For instance, new studies have shown that the companies in rural areas had to increase their surveillance budget up by 20%. For these reasons, industries are reluctant to move out. To conclude, relocation has become increasingly common, while companies no doubt, experience security and transportation complications, it is in fact the barriers that will lead to main advantages of relocation which is economies of scale. As a contradiction of thoughts, it is the hardship that ultimately makes the experience of relocation more advantage than disadvantages.
Relocating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
from urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
to suburban region has been
progressively
increasing over the decade. Although establishments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
struggle with security and infrastructure, while in the rural sector, they will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their hands on low cost land, nonetheless, they can create significant employment opportunity for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
around there. In my opinion, industries are far better off relocated to less developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, despite the challenges they will
inevitably
face.

The greatest benefits of relocating are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
can create considerable employment opportunities in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
that will
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the condition of the resident that would be impossible, if they had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
slight work opportunities. Being in rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
economies of the scale through expanding their operations on inexpensive land
rather
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
those available funds for extensive research and development,
For example
, In 2010, MGM had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to ruler
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
results in cost saving against expensive rents,
moreover
, they brought in new products to market by diverting those funds to research and development.

The main challenges the establishment will face while moving out to remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
are
usually
from lack of transportation infrastructure and security,
additionally
, these differences can pose a massive obstacle for them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
beyond their capabilities and expertise to manage the said issues whereas they execute considerable measures to cope with the inconvenience.
For instance
, new studies have shown that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
in rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
had to increase their surveillance budget up by 20%. For these reasons, industries are reluctant to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
out.

To conclude
, relocation has become
increasingly
common, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
no doubt, experience security and transportation complications, it is in fact the barriers that will lead to main advantages of relocation which is economies of scale. As a contradiction of thoughts, it is the hardship that
ultimately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the experience of relocation more advantage than disadvantages.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think it would be better for large companies and industries to move out to regional areas outside large urban centers. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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