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Some people think it is better for people to change their career at least once in their life and do different kinds of jobs. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.4

Some people think it is better for people to change their career at least once in their life and do different kinds of jobs. with this opinion? v. 4
There are plethora jobs all around the world and people choose different professions in their life according to their talents. But few people change their course whenever they feel stressed in their current work. Even though the people do the race, which they like after a few years they will feel bored and stressed. Sometimes it may cause psychological problems. So it becomes important for the people to conversion their profession for their mental relief. But the person who needs to deviation his course need face few problems like interviews, economical problems, etc. . . . So people can their professions as they wish and due to these psychological problems in people can be reduced. But in other hands changing the carer is not acceptable because if the people modify their job as they wish the company need to face several problems in lack of employers so it affects the economic growth of the company. In some cases even though the person was a genius he may find some problem in getting a new job. So it is suggested that people need to resign their profession after completing the arrangements for the new career. In some cases, people resign their job to find their new race due to their unlucky they won't get any new task. So they will be left unemployed. But lucky people will get employment. So at one point of view, it is a good activity, but in another point of view it' dangerous. So it is advised for the people to love their profession that they do and they should not think it as a stress. So as discussed changing the career has both merits and demerits
There are plethora
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
all around the world and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professions
in their life according to their talents.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their course whenever they feel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
work.

Even though
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do the race, which they like after a few years they will feel bored and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
it may cause psychological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it becomes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to conversion their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
for their mental relief.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the person who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to deviation his course
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
face few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
like interviews,
Did you mean "economic" (=connected with economy)?
economical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, etc.
Two consecutive dots
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.


This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
professions
as they wish and due to these psychological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in other hands changing the carer is not acceptable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
modify their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
as they wish the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to face several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
in lack of employers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it affects the economic growth of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases
even though
the person was a genius he may find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
in getting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it
is suggested
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to resign their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
after completing the arrangements for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
career.

In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
resign their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
to find their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
race due to their unlucky they won't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
task.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
unemployed.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
lucky
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
employment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
at one point of view, it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
activity,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in another point of view it'
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it
is advised
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
profession
that they
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
do and
they should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
So
as discussed changing the career has both merits and demerits
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think it is better for people to change their career at least once in their life and do different kinds of jobs. with this opinion? v. 4

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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