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Some people think governments should spend as much money as possible exploring outer space (for example, traveling to the Moon and to other planets). Other people disagree and think governments should spend this money for our basic needs on Earth. Which o v.1

Some people think governments should spend as much money as possible exploring outer space (for example, traveling to the Moon and to other planets). Other people disagree and think governments should spend this money for our basic needs on Earth. Which o v. 1
At the moment, the media became like an archive to store the information and provide people with the latest news and newest discoveries. This essay will discuss the consequences of the media on people’s thought and the impact of media is a negative development on people's lives. Due to the power of media influence on society, it can change people's beliefs. Provide the community with information. The media give the people the information about the local news and universal news, and it plays a prominent role in the industry of public opinion and with the development of media, that matter becomes easier for everybody For example, the social media sites, such as Facebook, Twitter and YouTube Contributed to the revolutions of the Arab Spring. The amount of violence the children have watched in the media, films and video games is a terrible thing, where the teenagers spent a lot of hours every day watched those scenes. And became unable to discriminate between reality and imagination, therefore the violence becoming common for them. For example, New Zealand mosque massacre, a slaughterer has a gun attack the people they were praying in the mosque that a lot of people watched it on Facebook live. In conclusion, the media have influence cannot be denied in broadcast the news and boost awareness between the communities Through different ages and times also the media is double-edged sword, although it rises the knowledge about everything it can by violence tool increase the hate and the murder in society.
At the moment, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
became like an archive to store the information and provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
and newest discoveries. This essay will discuss the consequences of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
and the impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

Due to the power of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
influence on society, it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's beliefs. Provide the community with information. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
give the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
the information about the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
and universal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, and it plays a prominent role in the industry of public opinion and with the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, that matter becomes easier for
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
everybody


For example
, the social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
sites, such as Facebook, Twitter and YouTube Contributed to the revolutions of the Arab Spring.

The amount of violence the children have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, films and video games is a terrible thing, where the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
spent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
hours every day
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
those scenes. And became unable to discriminate between reality and imagination,
therefore
the violence becoming common for them.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
New
Zealand mosque massacre, a slaughterer has a gun attack the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
they were praying in the mosque that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
it on Facebook
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
have influence cannot
be denied
in broadcast the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
and boost awareness between the communities Through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ages and times
also
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is double-edged sword, although it rises the knowledge about everything it can
Did you maybe mean "buy" or "be"?
by
violence tool increase the hate and the murder in society.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think governments should spend as much money as possible exploring outer space (for example, traveling to the Moon and to other planets). Other people disagree and think governments should spend this money for our basic needs on Earth. Which o v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
252 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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