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Some people think government should tax unhealthy food to encourage people to begin to eat more healthy foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree v.1

Some people think government should tax unhealthy food to encourage people to begin to eat more healthy foods. v. 1
Processed food has become increasingly unpopular among certain demographic of society. These people claim that fast foods are hazardous to individual health and as such hefty tax should be charged for them. This essay will argue why the tax on unhealthy foods are entirely necessary despite some financial burdens. Health conscious individual has always been wary of unhealthy eating habits, They are justifiably worried about having highly processed and chemicalized substances that could potentially make them sick in addition, these people naturally feel protective of their health. For instance, A study published in the American General of Clinical Nutrition stated that people who ate junk food performed poorly on cognitive tests. These few instances have bolstered existing fears in certain groups of individual that unhealthy foods are not necessary and potentially more dangerous to oneself. Despite the risk associated with the junk food the idea of having it, still common. Moreover, the vast majority of the people are claiming the various health benefits of eating junk foods because they feel it contains all the nutrients that the body needs and the taste that contain one cannot avoid it easily, for example, calcium is one of the nutrients that found in unhealthy foods which helps in the greater development of healthy bones and teeth. Overall, unhealthy foods are healthier in contributing to nutritions that body really need and nothing can replace the taste of those foods. In conclusion, this essay argued that people who are in favour of taxes on unhealthy diets, they are well aware of the future outcomes. In my opinion, implementing higher taxes is an absolute imperative that is entirely justified despite the small and occasional benefits.
Processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
has become
increasingly
unpopular among certain demographic of society. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are hazardous to individual health and as such hefty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
should
be charged
for them. This essay will argue why the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are
entirely
necessary despite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
financial burdens.

Health conscious individual has always been wary of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
eating habits, They are
justifiably
worried about having
highly
processed and chemicalized substances that could
potentially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them sick
in addition
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
naturally
feel protective of their health.
For instance
, A study published in the American General of Clinical Nutrition stated that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who ate junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
performed
poorly
on cognitive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
. These few instances have bolstered existing fears in certain groups of individual that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are not necessary and
potentially
more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
to oneself.

Despite the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
associated with the junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of having it,
still
common.
Moreover
, the vast majority of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are claiming the various health benefits of eating junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they feel it contains all the nutrients that the body needs and the taste that contain one cannot avoid it
easily
,
for example
, calcium is one of the nutrients that found in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in the greater development of healthy bones and teeth.
Overall
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are healthier in contributing to
Possible spelling mistake found.
nutritions
that body
really
need and nothing can replace the taste of those foods.

In conclusion
, this essay argued that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
diets, they are well aware of the future outcomes. In my opinion, implementing higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
is an absolute imperative
that is
entirely
justified despite the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
and occasional benefits.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay Some people think government should tax unhealthy food to encourage people to begin to eat more healthy foods. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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