Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people say that travelling abroad is necessary to get knowledge about other countries, while others suggest that TV and the internet can also help people know about foreign countries. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.2

Some people say that travelling abroad is necessary to get knowledge about other countries, while others suggest that TV and the internet can also help people know about foreign countries. v. 2
The debate about whether should people to visit abroad to learn about other culture has been long controversy. And until now, there is still no final conclusion on it. This essay will discuss both views. On the one hand, some people believe learning form the Internet or TV saves time as well as money. The development of technology like smart phone and internet enables residents to acquire almost all kinds of knowledge they needed without going outside. The advances in imaging technology make videos more real and accurate, also provide more detail. So it is a better way for people who has less time or money to travel oversea to learn about other countries. Moreover, some scenic spots where with too many tourists can makes the travel experience poor and sick. Therefore, travelling abroad is unnecessary in this case. However, there are many advocators who declare that only by physical travel can tourists know a country in a deep and real way. Tourists not only can visiting local tourist attractions like ancient palace or modern museum, but also can they communicate with local people. With an enjoyable chat in personal lifestyle or on traditional culture, visitors can have a deeper impression of that place. From my perspective, the two ways of learning about the world have their own benefit. For people who has sufficient time and money, travelling physically obviously bring more enjoyable experience. But for people whose money and time do not allow, learning the outside world from internet or TV is also useful in some case.
The debate about whether should
people
to visit abroad to learn about other culture has been long controversy. And until
now
, there is
still
no final conclusion on it. This essay will discuss both views.

On the one hand,
some
people
believe learning form the Internet or TV saves
time
as well
as
money
. The development of technology like smart phone and internet enables residents to acquire almost all kinds of knowledge they needed without going outside. The advances in imaging technology
make
videos more real and accurate,
also
provide more detail.
So
it is a better way for
people
who
has
less
time
or
money
to travel oversea to learn about other countries.
Moreover
,
some
scenic spots where with too
many
tourists
can
makes
the travel experience poor and sick.
Therefore
, travelling abroad is unnecessary
in this case
.

However
, there are
many
advocators
who declare that
only
by physical travel can
tourists
know a country in a deep and real way.
Tourists
not
only
can visiting local
tourist
attractions like ancient palace or modern museum,
but
also
can they communicate with local
people
. With an enjoyable chat in personal lifestyle or on traditional culture, visitors can have a deeper impression of that place.

From my perspective, the two ways of learning about the world have their
own
benefit. For
people
who
has
sufficient
time
and
money
, travelling
physically
obviously
bring more enjoyable experience.
But
for
people
whose
money
and
time
do not
allow
, learning the outside world from internet or TV is
also
useful in
some
case.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that travelling abroad is necessary to get knowledge about other countries, while others suggest that TV and the internet can also help people know about foreign countries. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts