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Some people say that tourism has many negative effects on the countries that people travel to. How true is this statement? What can tourists do to reduce the harmful effects of tourism on local cultures and environments? v.6

Some people say that tourism has many negative effects on the countries that people travel to. How true is this statement? What can tourists do to reduce the harmful effects of tourism on local cultures and environments? v. 6
Recently, the rate of crimes around the world has been dramatically increased. In order to redress the imbalance resulted from such accidents, many solutions are going to be suggested through this essay besides some of the important causes behind such problem. One of the main reasons why crime has widely increased lately is illiteracy. Since many people are no longer interested in education or even sending their offspring to schools. Therefore, a generation of uneducated is going to negatively affect the rest of the society. It’s like placing a ruined fruit on a plate with intact fruits, surely the others would be ruined too. Additionally, another reason which should be taken into consideration is unemployment. As unemployed people tend to commit crimes such as, robbery in order to get money, which they are going to spend probably on drug addiction or alcohol consumption. I believe that an absence of parental guidance plays an important role in these cases, if parents are more aware of their children tendencies and attitudes, there will be less crime rates than these existing now. Therefore, a parental supervision is highly recommended from the very young age to avert such drastic subsequences. Another way to eliminate the crime spread is through education. As educated people are less violent and aggressive than uneducated. Furthermore, providing jobs besides occupations for those who are unemployed with reasonable salaries so that they will not resort to commit crimes or harm others. To conclude, governmental efforts along with individual support are extremely required to avert the negative drawbacks of illiteracy and unemployment which in most cases is committing crimes. So, by addressing these problems, the crime rates would certainly decrease.
Recently, the rate of
crimes
around the world has been
dramatically
increased. In order to redress the imbalance resulted from such accidents,
many
solutions are going to
be suggested
through this essay
besides
some of the
important
causes behind such problem.

One of the main reasons why
crime
has
widely
increased lately is illiteracy. Since
many
people
are no longer interested in education or even sending their offspring to schools.
Therefore
, a generation of uneducated is going to
negatively
affect the rest of the society. It’s like placing a ruined fruit on a plate with intact fruits,
surely
the others would
be ruined
too.
Additionally
, another reason which should
be taken
into consideration is unemployment. As unemployed
people
tend to commit
crimes
such as, robbery in order to
get
money, which they are going to spend
probably
on drug addiction or alcohol consumption.

I believe that an absence of parental guidance plays an
important
role in these cases, if parents are more aware of their children tendencies and attitudes, there will be less
crime
rates than these existing
now
.
Therefore
, a parental supervision is
highly
recommended from the
very
young age to avert such drastic subsequences. Another way to eliminate the
crime
spread is through education. As educated
people
are less violent and aggressive than uneducated.
Furthermore
, providing jobs
besides
occupations for those who
are unemployed
with reasonable salaries
so
that they will not resort to commit
crimes
or harm others.

To conclude
, governmental efforts along with individual support are
extremely
required to avert the
negative
drawbacks of illiteracy and unemployment which
in most cases
is committing
crimes
.
So
, by addressing these problems, the
crime
rates would
certainly
decrease.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that tourism has many negative effects on the countries that people travel to. How true is this statement? What can tourists do to reduce the harmful effects of tourism on local cultures and environments? v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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