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Some people say that to solve today global problem every nation should have a good relationship with other nation to what extent do you agree or disagree with statement v.1

Some people say that to solve today global problem every nation should have a good relationship with other nation with statement v. 1
It is argued that in this modern society, good relations among countries are essential to tackle the international problems. In my opinion, while I agree that cooperation is the key for all the nations can resolve heated issues, I also believe that a country could solve the problems on its own. On the one hand, there are two benefits countries can obtain from having a cordial relationship. Firstly, participating in international organizations can help countries improve environment. To illustrate, nowadays, more and more countries are affected severely by climate change such as more frequently flood and drought longer. Typically, Vietnam which is one of the most countries have been impacted by global warming, joins hands together with other countries to curb the deterioration of environment. Moreover, healthy relations across countries could even solve the social problems. For example, the establishment of the international criminal police organizations, contribute to reduce the terrorism in the world, bring peaceful for people. On the other hand, some countries decide to cope with problems by their ability rather than building healthy relationships. Indeed, once countries take part in organizations, they need to obey the regulation of institutions. Consequently, the law systems might be overlapped another and the citizens will feel it too complex to follow. So, many nations such as Sweden and Norway, which opts for developing renewable energies to substitute fossil fuels and now, and they succeed in energy conservation. In conclusion, I believe that cordial relationships between countries will not only solve social problems like terrorism but also make the world a better place to live by focusing on limiting the pollution. Meanwhile, nations should not rely too much on other countries, they also should be independent to choose the best ways for solving the global problems
It
is argued
that in this modern society,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
relations among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are essential to tackle the international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. In my opinion, while I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that cooperation is the key for all the nations can resolve heated issues, I
also
believe that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
could solve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
on its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
.

On the one hand, there are two benefits
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can obtain from having a cordial relationship.
Firstly
, participating in international organizations can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
environment. To illustrate, nowadays, more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
severely
by climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
such as more
frequently
flood and drought longer.
Typically
, Vietnam which is one of the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have
been impacted
by global warming,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joins
hands together with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to curb the deterioration of environment.
Moreover
, healthy relations across
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
could even solve the social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
.
For example
, the establishment of the international criminal police organizations, contribute to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the terrorism in the world, bring peaceful for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
decide to cope with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
by their ability
rather
than building healthy relationships.
Indeed
, once
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in organizations, they need to obey the regulation of institutions.
Consequently
, the law systems might
be overlapped
another and the citizens will feel it
Did you mean "to"?
too
complex to follow.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations such as Sweden and Norway, which opts for developing renewable energies to substitute fossil fuels and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, and they succeed in energy conservation.

In conclusion
, I believe that cordial relationships between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
solve social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
like terrorism
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the world a better place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
by focusing on limiting the pollution. Meanwhile, nations should not rely too much on other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, they
also
should be independent to choose the best ways for solving the global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that to solve today global problem every nation should have a good relationship with other nation with statement v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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