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Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. v.22

In today's world computers are becoming part of many people's life in many youngsters are spending their time by playing computer video games. There are many bad impacts of playing games for children in spite of there are also many feasible approach to minimize the addiction of games. nowadays many young people such as teenagers and adult sons are playing laptop games due to they get bored from a real life. By spending most of your time so eventually be addicted to game. As a result they might have an eye issues because of coming lights from screen of computers. Addition by sitting on a chair for hours and staring to computer had the huge bad impact to the body of a child it might end up with bad back diagnose. according to Siri conducted by house hospital in 2016 50% of boys and girls has an eye and back diagnose due to computer video games. my friend John can't see a long distance and he has a diagnosis of minus 4 on both eyes. Throughout the world there are many ways decrease the number of children who are playing games on the laptop. one possible approach might be increasing prices of video games however this one stop children's whose parents are rich but high cost of games might minimize quantities of young gamers. Another good approach is to give a good behavior to kids from their parents. As a result kids will eventually understand the bad impact of video games. For instance my mother always says that games have really bad diagnose. Oh well there are many huge bad impacts to the body of the children who plays computer games. Nevertheless there are much can be done to make a minimum as much as it is possible.
In
today
's world computers are becoming part of
many
people
's life in
many
youngsters are spending their time by
playing
computer
video
games
. There are
many
bad
impacts
of
playing
games
for children
in spite of
there are
also
many
feasible approach to minimize the addiction of games.

nowadays
many
young
people
such as
teenagers
and adult sons are
playing
laptop
games
due to they
get
bored from a real life. By spending most of your time
so
eventually
be addicted
to game.
As
a result they
might
have an eye issues
because
of coming lights from screen of computers. Addition by sitting on a chair for hours and staring to computer had the huge
bad
impact
to the body of a child it
might
end
up with
bad
back diagnose.
according
to Siri conducted by
house
hospital in 2016 50% of boys and girls has an eye and back diagnose due to computer
video
games
.
my
friend John can't
see
a long
distance and
he has a diagnosis of minus 4 on both eyes.

Throughout the world there are
many
ways decrease the number of children who are
playing
games
on the laptop.
one
possible approach
might
be increasing prices of
video
games
however
this one
stop
children's whose parents are rich
but
high cost of
games
might
minimize quantities of young gamers. Another
good
approach is to give a
good
behavior to kids from their parents.
As
a result kids will
eventually
understand the
bad
impact
of
video
games
.
For instance
my mother always says that
games
have
really
bad
diagnose.

Oh
well there are
many
huge
bad
impacts
to the body of the children who plays computer
games
.
Nevertheless
there are much can
be done
to
make
a minimum as much as it is possible.
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IELTS essay Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets, and there is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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