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Some people say that modern innovations bring a lot more problems than benefits? Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people say that modern innovations bring a lot more problems than benefits? v. 1
As the world is now utterly dominated by technology, human have witnessed much advancement in our life from the smartphone to the spaceship. In spite of these inventions, there are still some people reckon that was a lot more harmful than useful. In this essay below, I will try to use specific reasons and examples to clarify my opinion. To begin with, modernization has brought many benefits to humankind. Firstly, it brings comfort and convenience to our life. For example, many inventions such as car, airplane, train, … have made travelling much easier. Secondly, this support the economic situation in the countries and bring everyone closer since the trade and business have made us aware of different countries and open a global market. Last but not least, the space science has blessed the field of weather, as it has created the satellite, which help us in foretelling the climate changes, so that we can know what to prepare. For instance, the sea-sailers and fishermen can realize the calamities, thank to the weather forecast. However, technology also has some drawbacks too. It is undoubtedly true that the satisfaction that modern life give us is one of the main reasons why we are gradually becoming More and more inactive. For example, youngster nowadays tends to waste a lot of energy on playing computer game or surfing the internet, therefore, they don’t have any power left to play sport and study. Other disadvantages of it that I would like to draw that this situation will, unfortunately, lead to pollution. Because, as a matter of fact that modernization always goes along with industrialisation. Due to this reason, many factories have been built and these discharges a large amount of gas and dirt into the environment. From the arguments made above, it can be concluded that the advantages of modern innovation outweigh any disadvantages it has. In my opinion, the world has turned into a wonderful place to live in because of those advancements.
As the world is
now
utterly
dominated by technology, human have witnessed much advancement in our life from the smartphone to the spaceship.
In spite of
these inventions, there are
still
some
people
reckon that was a lot more harmful than useful. In this essay below, I will try to
use
specific reasons and examples to clarify my opinion.

To
begin
with, modernization has brought
many
benefits to humankind.
Firstly
, it brings comfort and convenience to our life.
For example
,
many
inventions such as car, airplane, train, … have made travelling much easier.
Secondly
, this support the economic situation in the countries and bring everyone closer since the trade and business have made us aware of
different
countries and open a global market. Last
but
not least, the space science has blessed the field of weather, as it has created the satellite, which
help
us in foretelling the climate
changes
,
so
that we can know what to prepare.
For instance
, the
sea-sailers
and fishermen can realize the calamities, thank to the weather forecast.

However
, technology
also
has
some
drawbacks too. It is
undoubtedly
true that the satisfaction that modern life give us is one of the main reasons why we are
gradually
becoming

More and more inactive.
For example
, youngster nowadays tends to waste
a lot of
energy on playing computer game or surfing the internet,
therefore
, they don’t have any power
left
to play sport and study. Other disadvantages of it that I would like to draw that this situation will, unfortunately, lead to pollution.
Because
, as a matter of fact that modernization always goes along with
industrialisation
. Due to this reason,
many
factories have
been built
and these discharges a large amount of gas and dirt into the environment.

From the arguments made above, it can
be concluded
that the advantages of modern innovation outweigh any disadvantages it has. In my opinion, the world has turned into a wonderful place to
live
in
because
of those advancements.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that modern innovations bring a lot more problems than benefits? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
329 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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