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Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree? v.14

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. v. 14
It is true that in these days, some building such as office and school, have open designs rather than different rooms. There are various reasons behind this trend. I personally believe that this trend has positive impacts and I would explain various reasons to prove my view in the upcoming paragraphs. The first and foremost reason is cost effective. To be more precise, people have not invested their money on constructing a separate room to each employee or worker as well separate a separate room has to add other expenses of various amenities such as infrastructure, camera, furniture etc. Therefore, open space designs help to save money by providing all facilities at one place. Another worth mentioning reason is limited space. Because, in these days, the population is increased from past decades, which becomes area more crowded and they have to consume more space for accommodation so people have to construct their building in Limited place which definitely possible with open space design. As per my perspective, this trend is a positive development. Firstly, it provides an interactive environment among people at their work station. They can build their relationship with other people easily, which definitely increase the level of socialization. Secondly, it makes easier to enhance their personality development skills such as coordinate, teamwork which definitely positive development among worker and managing director. In addition, people can enhance their knowledge of these kind of places. Because, they can share ideas or get knowledge from their senior without any barrier. So, they will able to tackle each problem with using these ideas and taking help from their coworker if they are stuck in an issue. Last but not least, this trend is able to provide equal levels of amenities to their whole faculty members and people do not bother about their status at work station. Thus, it helps to reduce the dominated environment status amongst people. To conclude, I would like to reiterate that this is certainly a positive development because of various positive outcomes.
It is true that in these days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
building such as office and school, have open designs
rather
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
rooms. There are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
behind this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
. I
personally
believe that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
impacts and I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
to prove my view in the upcoming paragraphs.

The
first
and foremost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is cost
effective. To be more precise,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have not invested their money on constructing a separate room to each employee or worker
as well
separate a separate room
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
other expenses of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
amenities such as infrastructure, camera, furniture etc.
Therefore
, open
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
designs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to save money by providing all facilities at one place. Another worth mentioning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
, in these days, the population
is increased
from past decades, which becomes area more
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
crowded and
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
consume more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
for accommodation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
construct their building in Limited place which definitely possible with open
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
design.

As per my perspective, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
.
Firstly
, it provides an interactive environment among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
at their work station. They can build their relationship with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
easily
, which definitely increase the level of socialization.
Secondly
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
easier to enhance their personality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as coordinate, teamwork which definitely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
among worker and managing director.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can enhance their knowledge of
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of places.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
, they can share
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
knowledge from their senior without any barrier.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they
Did you mean "will be able"?
will able
to tackle each problem with using these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and taking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
from their coworker if they
are stuck
in an issue. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
is able to provide equal levels of amenities to their whole faculty members and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not bother about their status at work station.
Thus
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the dominated environment status
Do not mix variants of the same word ('amongst' and 'among') within a single text.
amongst
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To conclude
, I would like to reiterate that this is
certainly
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
outcomes.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. v. 14

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
335 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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