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Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough time on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree? v.23

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough time on learning practical skills. v. 23
education which is a primary source for development is very important for our society. Some people believe that in all the education levels from lower school to graduation, it is found that time is spent on learning competitive subjects and not giving time to learn additional skills. however both are necessary for future prospects of life when applying for a job. it is generally thought that giving university education helps people to apply for jobs such as teacher, doctor, engineer etc. All universities mostly focus on competitive subjects like math, science, literature which helps them for upcoming competitions in jobs and increases economic development of a country. however, when applying for a business job such as management, leadership and additional skills with high experience and increased interpersonal skills plays an important role. For instance, when applied for a job of a sales person which asks for skills of attracting customers not for education. I completely believe that including practical skills subject in university education helps students to become more confident and increases communication skills, leadership’s skills and inter-personal skills required for any job applied further.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
education
which is a primary source for development is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for our society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that in all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
levels from lower school to graduation, it
is found
that time
is spent
on learning competitive subjects and not giving time to learn additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
however
both are necessary for future prospects of life when applying for a job.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is
generally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that giving university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to apply for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
such as teacher, doctor, engineer etc. All universities
mostly
focus on competitive subjects like math, science, literature which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them for upcoming competitions in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and increases economic development of a country.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, when applying for a business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
such as management, leadership and additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
with high experience and increased interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role.
For instance
, when applied for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
of a sales person which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
asks for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
of attracting customers not for education.

I completely believe that including practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
subject in university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
students to become more confident and increases communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, leadership’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and inter-personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
required for any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
applied
further
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough time on learning practical skills. v. 23

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
185 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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