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Some people say that excessive noise should be a criminal offence, while others say they should be free to make noise without limitation. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.2

Some people say that excessive noise should be a criminal offence, while others say they should be free to make noise without limitation. v. 2
Some people argue that producing a high level of noise should be punished by law, while others argue that individuals should have liberty to make any amount of noise. In my opinion, the punishment should be given to the ones who make abnormal level noise. Any kind of nuisance such as, extreme voices, should be considered against the law. Firstly, Legal action should be taken against those who generate extreme nuisance voice. Secondly, Loud noises can be very disturbing to neighbours, the general public and even animals. Certain people don’t bother about others getting disturbed due to them. In such cases, excessively loud noises should be made punishable. For example, in Denmark, hospitals follow a strict no-roar policy and a person can be heavily penalized by legal if he makes too much sound. This has ensured the well-being of patients and visitors. However, some say that people should have the freedom to make as much roar as they like. It is wrong to assume that because every individual has a certain responsibility towards himself and others and must act in a way that does not harm anyone who is around him. They must be sensible and show empathy to others around them and this is their moral obligation. For instance, it is extremely inappropriate for a person to make too much roar in a funeral ceremony because it would show that he lacks empathy. He must, therefore, remain silent so that others do not get disturbed. In conclusion, making excessive sound should be punishable by law and no man should have the freedom to make as much roar as he likes. In my opinion, excessive sound should be a criminal offence to ensure that communities can co-exist peacefully.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that producing a high level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noise
should
be punished
by law, while others argue that individuals should have liberty to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
any amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noise
. In my opinion, the punishment should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to the ones who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
abnormal level noise.

Any kind of nuisance such as, extreme voices, should
be considered
against the law.
Firstly
, Legal action should
be taken
against those who generate extreme nuisance voice.
Secondly
, Loud
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noises
can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
disturbing to
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
, the
Consider using "public".
general public
and even animals. Certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
don’t bother about others getting disturbed due to them. In such cases,
excessively
loud
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noises
should
be made
punishable.
For example
, in Denmark, hospitals follow a strict no-roar policy and a person can be
heavily
penalized by legal if he
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
sound. This has ensured the well-being of patients and visitors.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
say that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should have the freedom to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
roar as they like. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
to assume that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
every individual has a certain responsibility towards himself
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
act in a way that does not harm anyone who is around him. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be sensible and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
empathy to others around them and this is their moral obligation.
For instance
, it is
extremely
inappropriate for a person to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
too
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
roar in a funeral ceremony
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that he lacks empathy. He
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
,
therefore
, remain silent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that others do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
disturbed.

In conclusion
, making excessive sound should be punishable by law and no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
should have the freedom to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
much
roar as he likes. In my opinion, excessive sound should be a criminal
Possible spelling mistake. 'offence' is British English.
offence
to ensure that communities can co-exist
peacefully
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that excessive noise should be a criminal offence, while others say they should be free to make noise without limitation. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
9
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 9.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 9.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 9.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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