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Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging the environment so it must be stopped. Discuss both views and give opinion. v.6

Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging the environment so it must be stopped. v. 6
It is thought that improving financial condition helps to culminate the shortages of diet and destitute. However, others argue that environment is destroyed by economic development. Therefore, it is necessary to stop financial advancement. This essay will highlight both statements. On the one hand, it is true that financial improvement is the only solution to reduce starvation and impoverished from the country. Initially, the primary reason of economic advancement means the development of the agricultural sector. More crop is harvested in the country and people cannot face the problems of adequate meal. Subsequently, when the country economical condition is improved, people can get various job opportunities in factories, banks, shops and so on. Then, citizen's may start earning money that could assist them to survive a healthy life and reduce poverty. On the other hand, financial buildup affects the environment. This is because public starts to destroy the habitats of numerous flora and fauna to fulfil their basic necessities. Similarly, several wild lives are in danger situations due to deforestation, factories Vehicles. Moreover, when a nation financial status rises, then, automatically, a number of persons financial background revamps. Likewise, the way of human activities could cause a serious issue on the environment. For instance, an individual uses a car that produces carbon dioxide and affects the whole ecosystem. In conclusion, Although, the financial evolution upgrades the people's standards of living by removing financial crisis of the nation. Despite, the ecosystem is badly affected by financial development. In my opinion, the growth in economic is mandatory for the advancement of a state. At the same time, the public must be concerned about its impact on the nature. Lastly, working together will support the preservation of the universe.
It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
condition
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to culminate the shortages of diet and destitute.
However
, others argue that environment is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
by economic development.
Therefore
, it is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
advancement. This essay will highlight both statements.

On the one hand, it is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
improvement is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
solution to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
starvation and impoverished from the country.
Initially
, the primary reason of economic advancement means the development of the agricultural sector. More crop
is harvested
in the country and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
cannot face the problems of adequate meal.
Subsequently
, when the country economical condition is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
various job opportunities in factories, banks, shops and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. Then, citizen's may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
earning money that could assist them to survive a healthy life and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
poverty.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
buildup affects the environment. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
public
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the habitats of numerous flora and fauna to fulfil their
Consider using "necessities".
basic necessities
.
Similarly
, several wild
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
are in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
situations due to deforestation, factories Vehicles.
Moreover
, when a nation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
status rises, then,
automatically
, a number of persons
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
background revamps.
Likewise
, the way of human activities could cause a serious issue on the environment.
For instance
, an individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
a car that produces carbon dioxide and affects the whole ecosystem.

In conclusion
, Although, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
evolution upgrades the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's standards of living by removing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
crisis of the nation. Despite, the ecosystem is
badly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
development. In my opinion, the growth in economic is mandatory for the advancement of a state. At the same time, the public
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be concerned
about its impact on the nature.
Lastly
, working together will support the preservation of the universe.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging the environment so it must be stopped. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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