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Some people say that e-boos and modern technology will totally replace traditional newspapers and magazines. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people say that e-boos and modern technology will totally replace traditional newspapers and magazines. v. 1
Nowadays, technology equipment is quite famous in the world. Many people say that the traditional newspapers and magazines will totally replace with e-books and modern technology. I strongly agreed that the e-book and modern machinery will totally replace the traditional newspapers and magazines. The first reason is convenient for the viewers of traditional newspapers and magazines. Many people have computers and phones to find the news or book in anywhere and anytime. So that, they do not go anywhere to buy the newspapers and magazines. For example, some of the people that can not go out or do not have transportation, they can use phones or computers to search the news or books. This also will convenient for viewers of traditional newspapers and magazines to find the previous news or a few months ago and the history of what they viewed recently. For example, many applications of the newspaper have many functions such as search the keyword that you can find the news that you want and the historical data that you recently viewed. The second reason is to reduce the paper to protect the environment. The tree is the raw material of paper, so that many people cut down the trees to make the paper but this will destroy the environment. For example, increase the pollution and many animals did not have shelter such as a jungle. In conclusion, I agreed with e-book and modern technology will replace the traditional newspapers and magazines. The reasons are convenient to the viewer of traditional newspaper and magazines and to reduce the paper to protect the environment.
Nowadays, technology equipment is quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
in the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
say that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
will
totally
replace with e-books and modern technology. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
that the e-book and modern machinery will
totally
replace the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and magazines.

The
first
reason is convenient for the viewers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have computers and phones to find the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
or book in anywhere and anytime.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that, they do not go anywhere to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
.
For example
,
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that can not go out or do not have transportation, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
phones or computers to search the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
or books. This
also
will convenient for viewers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
to find the previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
or a few months ago and the history of what they viewed recently.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
applications of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
functions such as search the keyword that you can find the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
that you want and the historical data that you recently viewed.

The second reason is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the paper to protect the environment. The tree is the raw material of paper,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down the trees to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the paper
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
the environment.
For example
, increase the pollution and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
animals did not have shelter such as a jungle.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
with e-book and modern technology will replace the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspapers
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
. The reasons are convenient to the viewer of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
newspaper
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
magazines
and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the paper to protect the environment.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that e-boos and modern technology will totally replace traditional newspapers and magazines. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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