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Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.1

Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1
At present computer is one of the essential parts of our daily life. Many people of today's society are of the opinion that computer is the blessings of modern science which make our life more comfortable and handy while others oppose this concept but my inclination is toward the former. On one hand, it is argued that due to the more dependency on the computer, life is more tensed and complicated now. The most vital point for the demand which can initially be mentioned is that excessive technology based recent life. For example, modern school education systems are mainly computer based so students have no opportunity to learn mathematical skill even small subtraction and addition they cannot count without a computer. Besides Children are too much addicted to computer games rather than other outdoor activities and finally our future generation are becoming more machine dependent and physically disable and it results seems like in near future horror science fiction will be true. A further point is that computer hard disk crash and viruses are like natural disasters and make our life literally impossible. On the other hand, there are quite plausible reasons how the computer is becoming the part and parcel of our everyday life. What can be cited first regarding this is due to communication and information technology now World is in our hand. Anyone can reach any corner of the world within in a second. There are so many ways to communicate with each other such as email, online chatting, voice mail, video chat etc. To clarify this matter from home any one takes part in a job interview, conference or any online class. He/she does not need to go there physically but in the digital world, it is possible. What's more online marketing, banking etc. make our life more convenient so we can enjoy a strong personal relationship. Last but not the least, any business and official work can be accomplished efficiently because of electronic data management, for instance, electronic files are easily stored and maintained rather than paper documents. In a nutshell taking all the aforementioned pros and cons into account, I personally opine that computer is the most wonderful gift of our life
At present computer is one of the essential parts of our daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's society are of the opinion that computer is the blessings of modern science which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
more comfortable and handy while others oppose this concept
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
my inclination is toward the former.

On one hand, it
is argued
that due to the more dependency on the computer,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is more tensed and complicated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. The most vital point for the demand which can
initially
be mentioned
is that excessive technology based recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
For example
, modern school education systems are
mainly
computer based
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
students have no opportunity to learn mathematical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
subtraction and addition they cannot count without a computer.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Besides
Children are too much addicted to computer games
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
outdoor activities and
finally
our future generation are becoming more machine dependent and
physically
disable and it results seems like in near future horror science fiction will be true. A
further
point is that computer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
disk crash and viruses are like natural disasters and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
literally
impossible.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are quite plausible reasons how the computer is becoming the part and parcel of our everyday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. What can
be cited
first
regarding this is due to communication and information technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
World is in our hand. Anyone can reach any corner of the world within in a second. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways to communicate with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
such as email, online chatting, voice mail, video chat etc. To clarify this matter from home
Did you mean "anyone"?
any one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
takes part
in a job interview, conference or any online
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. He/she does not need to go there
physically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the digital world, it is possible. What's more online marketing, banking etc.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
more convenient
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we can enjoy a strong personal relationship. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the least, any business and official work can
be accomplished
efficiently
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of electronic data management,
for instance
, electronic files are
easily
stored and maintained
rather
than paper documents.

In a nutshell taking all the aforementioned pros and cons into account, I
personally
opine that computer is the most wonderful gift of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
367 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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